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Parmo v poutine: The ultimate post-pub nosh deathmatch

Middlesbrough battles Canada for supersaturated supremacy

The smart choice: opportunity from uncertainty

Right, that's the Canadian contestant, now let's see how the English challenger measures up.

For the parmo you'll need pork fillet, eggs, breadcrumbs, cheese and the ability to conjure up a béchamel sauce. Here's our visual guide to how to make a parmo:

Our guide to preparing parmo

Now just stick the parmo under the grill for five minutes or so and serve – with chips, naturally:

The finished parmo and chips

So, what's the verdict? Well, I'd like to be able to report that the Spanish locals were willing to give these two tempting dishes a go and report back, but no sooner did we emerge from the kitchen bearing platters of goodness, than the bar immediately emptied.

Among the excuses offered for not being able to stick around to try our hearty fare was one bloke who'd forgotten it was his mother's funeral in 10 minutes, and another chap who after 40 years as a committed atheist, decided it was an opportune moment to go to Mass and be reclasped to the bosom of the Church.

It was left to we plucky Brits, then, to risk all for the advancement of culinary science. My kids rated the poutine as "nothing special", but were rather more taken with the parmo:

Rui and Katarina tuck into a parmo

In fact, as Rui pointed out, there's no reason whatsoever you can't serve the poutine as a side dish to the parmo, and which case you get the best of both worlds, even if your heart probably won't thank you for it. ®

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