The Register® — Biting the hand that feeds IT

Feeds
35%
Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Robotic behaviour

  • print
  • alert

Review Last year's War for Cybertron salvaged Transformers from gaming's scrapyard. While still not fully realising the potential of the IP, High Moon Studios' game combined reverential treatment of the fiction with solid controls and decent gameplay to mark a high point for the franchise.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Step on it, or someone'll step on it

You'd think it would be easy for High Moon to build upon those foundations to make a half-decent and entertaining follow-up, especially one based on a movie constructed around giant transforming mechs and mesmerising CGI-set pieces. But you'd be wrong. Dark of the Moon falls foul of one of gaming's oldest curses: the movie tie-in.

On this occasion, the source material isn't at fault. Michael Bay's third Transformers film might be an unmitigated stinker, with computers seemingly generating the one-dimensional plot and dialogue as well as the three-dimensional effects, but the game is based on events leading up to the movie, rather than the egregious movie itself. You can't even blame Shouty LaBouef or double-barrelled knickers mannequin Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, neither of whom, thankfully, feature in the game.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Gundamn MechWarriors

The only commonality, then, is one of vacuousness. A mindless emptiness fills Dark of the Moon. All War for Cybertron's good work in narrative and gameplay is undone. Its neatly weaved parallel Autobot and Decepticon story threading is replaced by disjointed chapters featuring the usual prominent Transformers in specific, thinly-connected missions.

Whether you're infiltrating a Decepticon hideout to eavesdrop on their communications or rescuing Shockwave from his cryogenic prison, missions are largely indistinguishable, save for their settings and threadbare expositions. The same repetitive combat and uninspired level design is repeated again and again throughout the woefully short five-hour campaign.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Clippin' wings

The Transformers themselves are also virtually indistinguishable. Bumblebee's sports car might be faster than Megatron's truck, and Soundwave's sonic gun more powerful than Warpath's Assault Rifle, but you'll hardly notice in a game that doesn't bother to explore those differences.

Next page: Huge-o boss

I raise you an Eva

"but the game is based on events leading up to the movie"

So we will see Megan Fox being thrown out of a movie studio?

12
0

35% ???

So it is better than the latest movie then.

4
0

"Megatron's truck"

wait what?!?!

Hate Michael Bay, hate him so much, unable to form coherent sentences.

3
0

just a thought but

"Technologically an embarrassment, Dark of the Moon is flawed, perfunctory and utterly devoid of vitality or personality. "

Hasn't that been a standard complaint of all movie tie in games since the beginning og such licensing venture ?

2
0

double-barrelled knickers mannequin Rosie Huntington-Whiteley

After the line "double-barrelled knickers mannequin Rosie Huntington-Whiteley", I read the rest of the review in my head in the voice of DCI Gene Hunt....

2
0

More from The Register

Android is a mess and needs sprucing up, admits chief
Can Google really fix it? It isn't in control any more
New Lumia 925: This, loyalists, is the BIG ONE you've waited for
Nokia veep drills high-end master plan for El Reg
Android device? Ooohhhh, you mean a Samsung phone
Koreans nabbed nearly all the Q1 profits – more even than Google
Review: HP Pavilion 14 Chromebook
All roads lead to Chrome?
Borked your iDevice? Pay EVEN MORE to have it fixed by Applecare
Or scream at their hapless techies on their forums
Euro PC shipments plummet into bottomless pit of DOOOOM
11th quarter of decline, 20pc drop on last year - Gartner
Report: AT&T dropping Facebook phone after dismal sales
Turns out folks won't buy that for a dollar