Feeds
35%
Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Robotic behaviour

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

Review Last year's War for Cybertron salvaged Transformers from gaming's scrapyard. While still not fully realising the potential of the IP, High Moon Studios' game combined reverential treatment of the fiction with solid controls and decent gameplay to mark a high point for the franchise.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Step on it, or someone'll step on it

You'd think it would be easy for High Moon to build upon those foundations to make a half-decent and entertaining follow-up, especially one based on a movie constructed around giant transforming mechs and mesmerising CGI-set pieces. But you'd be wrong. Dark of the Moon falls foul of one of gaming's oldest curses: the movie tie-in.

On this occasion, the source material isn't at fault. Michael Bay's third Transformers film might be an unmitigated stinker, with computers seemingly generating the one-dimensional plot and dialogue as well as the three-dimensional effects, but the game is based on events leading up to the movie, rather than the egregious movie itself. You can't even blame Shouty LaBouef or double-barrelled knickers mannequin Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, neither of whom, thankfully, feature in the game.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Gundamn MechWarriors

The only commonality, then, is one of vacuousness. A mindless emptiness fills Dark of the Moon. All War for Cybertron's good work in narrative and gameplay is undone. Its neatly weaved parallel Autobot and Decepticon story threading is replaced by disjointed chapters featuring the usual prominent Transformers in specific, thinly-connected missions.

Whether you're infiltrating a Decepticon hideout to eavesdrop on their communications or rescuing Shockwave from his cryogenic prison, missions are largely indistinguishable, save for their settings and threadbare expositions. The same repetitive combat and uninspired level design is repeated again and again throughout the woefully short five-hour campaign.

Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Clippin' wings

The Transformers themselves are also virtually indistinguishable. Bumblebee's sports car might be faster than Megatron's truck, and Soundwave's sonic gun more powerful than Warpath's Assault Rifle, but you'll hardly notice in a game that doesn't bother to explore those differences.

Intelligent flash storage arrays

Next page: Huge-o boss

More from The Register

next story
PEAK APPLE: iOS 8 is least popular Cupertino mobile OS in all of HUMAN HISTORY
'Nerd release' finally staggers past 50 per cent adoption
Tim Cook: The classic iPod HAD TO DIE, and this is WHY
Apple, er, couldn’t get parts for HDD models
Apple spent just ONE DOLLAR beefing up the latest iPad Air 2
New iPads look a lot like the old one. There's a reason for that
Google Glassholes are UNDATEABLE – HP exec
You need an emotional connection, says touchy-feely MD... We can do that
Microsoft fitness bands slapped on wrists: All YOUR HEALTH DATA are BELONG TO US
Wearable will deliver 'actionable insights for healthier living'
Lawyers mobilise angry mob against Apple over alleged 2011 Macbook Pro crapness
We suffered 'random bouts of graphical distortion' - fanbois
Caterham Seven 160 review: The Raspberry Pi of motoring
Back to driving's basics with a joyously legal high
prev story

Whitepapers

Choosing cloud Backup services
Demystify how you can address your data protection needs in your small- to medium-sized business and select the best online backup service to meet your needs.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
New hybrid storage solutions
Tackling data challenges through emerging hybrid storage solutions that enable optimum database performance whilst managing costs and increasingly large data stores.
Protecting users from Firesheep and other Sidejacking attacks with SSL
Discussing the vulnerabilities inherent in Wi-Fi networks, and how using TLS/SSL for your entire site will assure security.