Feeds

Acrobatic US driver in 85mph back-seat drunk sex prang

OK sarge, he says his name's 'Mister Tickle'

Boost IT visibility and business value

A court in Virginia must decide just whether it's actually possible to drive a car at 85mph while simultaneously engaging in drunken back-seat sex.

The answer is yes, according to a plaintiff who's filed a claim at Fairfax County Circuit Court for $75,000 damages against the driver who allegedly piled into his vehicle in May last year while over the speed limit, under the influence and on top of a female.

The taxi driver victim of the unnamed boy wonder states in his lawsuit:

  • Paragraph 10: “At the time of the collision, Defendant was going 85 miles per hour.”
  • Paragraph 12: “At the time of the collision, Defendant was having sex with a female.”
  • Paragraph 13: “At the time of the collision, Defendant was driving admittedly drunk.”
  • Paragraph 14: “At the time of the accident, Defendant was partially or totally in the backseat of the car.”

As the Washington Post notes, there is no paragraph 11, so we can only image what outrage has mercifully been excised from the lawsuit.

The case promises top legal entertainment. The defendant, who was apparently convicted of drunk driving in Fairfax district court last year (presumably as a result of the same crash), now improbably says he wasn't driving at all.

Rather than fingering his back-seat squeeze, he says yet another occupant of the car was actually at the wheel - something the mystery third party denies.

You're invited to try and make further sense of all this down at the Washington Post, which has more critical background right here. ®

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS
'Prettier, better organised, more harmonious than if men were in charge'
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
prev story

Whitepapers

Best practices for enterprise data
Discussing how technology providers have innovated in order to solve new challenges, creating a new framework for enterprise data.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Advanced data protection for your virtualized environments
Find a natural fit for optimizing protection for the often resource-constrained data protection process found in virtual environments.
How modern custom applications can spur business growth
Learn how to create, deploy and manage custom applications without consuming or expanding the need for scarce, expensive IT resources.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?