Feeds

Latvian film fan pops cap in loud popcorn eater

Black Swan enlivened by mastication-provoked slaying

Remote control for virtualized desktops

Updated Latvian cops cuffed a 27-year-old man on Saturday for allegedly popping a cap in a fellow cinemagoer for eating popcorn too loudly during a screening of Black Swan.

According to a report by local news agency Leta, regurgitated in the Guardian, the 42-year-old victim died of wounds sustained during a screening of the terpsichorean angstfest starring Natalie Portman.

Following a brief discussion over the offending popcorn, the shooter whipped out a "legally registered" piece and ensured that never again would Riga's Forum cinema complex be forced to suffer offensive mastication.

The perp is apparently "a graduate of the police academy who holds a doctorate in law from the University of Latvia". As an evident fan of the divine Ms Portman, we can only suggest his legal judgment and ammunition would have been better spent dispensing justice to those responsible for forcing the poor girl to participate in The Phantom Menace. ®

Update

We're obliged to a Latvian reader for clarifying that the shooter was actually the one eating crisps in a disorderly fashion when the victim complained. The former waited until the end of the movie before making his fatal move, at which point he was overpowered by other audience members until cops arrived. We have no information on the flavour of the crisps.

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

More from The Register

next story
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Google's whois results say it's a lousy smut searcher
Run whois google.com or whois microsoft.com. We dare you, you PIG◙◙◙◙ER
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
prev story

Whitepapers

Free virtual appliance for wire data analytics
The ExtraHop Discovery Edition is a free virtual appliance will help you to discover the performance of your applications across the network, web, VDI, database, and storage tiers.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
10 threats to successful enterprise endpoint backup
10 threats to a successful backup including issues with BYOD, slow backups and ineffective security.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Website security in corporate America
Find out how you rank among other IT managers testing your website's vulnerabilities.