Feeds

Big stink over Malawi farting ban

Solicitor general challenges trouser cough clampdown

Eight steps to building an HP BladeSystem

Officials in Malawi have locked horns over the controversial ban on farting in public.

The prohibition forms part of the Local Courts Bill, due for introduction next week. The legislation has the backing of justice minister George Chaponda, who said the clampdown on unruly bowels would promote "public decency".

According to the BBC, Chaponda did some straight talking on local Capital Radio's Straight Talk programme when he declared: "Just go to the toilet when you feel like farting."

As Chaponda sees it, the law will be enforced in a similar way to that banning public urination, with local chiefs tasked with bringing noxious gasbags to justice.

However, the minister has been challenged by solicitor general Anthony Kamanga, who reckons Chaponda's interpretation of the offending Local Courts Bill clause is taking the piss.

Said clause declares: "Any person who vitiates the atmosphere in any place so as to make it noxious to the public to the health of persons in general dwelling or carrying on business in the neighbourhood or passing along a public way shall be guilty of a misdemeanour."

Kamanga asserts that this refers to pollution. He said: "How any reasonable or sensible person can construe the provision to criminalising farting in public is beyond me."

Whether Malawi becomes the first nation to outlaw the trouser cough remains to be seen, but things are certainly looking rough for flatulent bogus soothsayers, since the Local Courts Bill also intends to come down hard on anyone pretending to be a fortune teller.

Real fortune tellers are, accordingly, advised to write the eventual outcome of the Chaponda/Kamanga stink on a piece of paper, seal it in an envelope and hand it to their solicitor for later presentation to tribal chiefs as evidence of their divinatory powers. ®

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
Delaware pair nabbed for getting saucy atop Mexican eatery
Burrito meets soft taco in alleged rooftop romp outrage
Japanese artist cuffed for disseminating 3D ladyparts files
Printable genitalia fall foul of 'obscene material' laws
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Apple: No, China. iPhone is NOT public enemy number 1
Beijing fears it could beam secrets back to America
Canuck reader threatens suicide over exact dimensions of SPAAAACE!
How many As? Reg hack's writing cops a shoeing
prev story

Whitepapers

Seven Steps to Software Security
Seven practical steps you can begin to take today to secure your applications and prevent the damages a successful cyber-attack can cause.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.
Consolidation: the foundation for IT and business transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.