Feeds

iPad apps: the 10 smartest and 10 stupidest

From the sublime to the 'WTF?'

3 Big data security analytics techniques

No. 6

Smart: SketchBook Pro

Sketchbook Pro

Having zero talent, I couldn't create a Sketchbook Pro artwork — this is from its Quick Tour

They say: "Using the same paint engine as its [AutoDesk] desktop counterpart, SketchBook Pro delivers a complete set of sketching & painting tools through a streamlined and intuitive user interface designed exclusively for the iPad experience."

The Reg says: I'm including this app as much for what actual talented people have told me about it as for my own expereince with it, seeing as how it's an artwork-creating app that's best enjoyed and employed by people with artistic talent.

And that ain't me, babe.

Still, even an image-maker with a kindergartener's skills such as myself can appreciate the depth of SketchBook Pro's interface and its intelligent use of multi-touch gestures. It may take you a bit of effort to learn the various and sundry ways of controlling the app, but — if you have talent — the results will be well worth it.

Price: $7.99


No. 6

Stupid: Sexy Dance HD

Sexy Dance

Warning: Sexy Dance may induce horrific nightmares (and yes, that's a fingerprint on her left bazoom)

They say: "Finally!! A woman you can actually control!"

The Reg says: The truly puzzling thing about this horrendous gob of stupidity is that coding it took far more skill than did, say, slapping together Simple Fruit Bowl. And so the question unavoidably arises: "Why, dear lord in heaven, why?"

Sexy Dance HD is the anti-BaconClock. While that faux-edible timepiece has a bit of naïve charm, Sexy (which isn't) Dance is — not to put too fine a point on it — mind-numbingly repulsive.

As the grotesque animated figure dances to a repetitive disco tune that'd nauseate even Leisure Suit Larry, she changes direction in response to tilting of the iPad. Finger taps induce a male voice to half-heartedly say "Yay!", and leave oily fingerprints that the dancer will occasionally pause her gyrations to wipe off the display.

Who buys this crap, anyway?

Price: 99¢

SANS - Survey on application security programs

Next page: No. 5

More from The Register

next story
Samsung Galaxy S5 fingerprint scanner hacked in just 4 DAYS
Sammy's newbie cooked slower than iPhone, also costs more to build
US mobile firms cave on kill switch, agree to install anti-theft code
Slow and kludgy rollout will protect corporate profits
Leaked pics show EMBIGGENED iPhone 6 screen
Fat-fingered fanbois rejoice over Chinternet snaps
Microsoft lobs pre-release Windows Phone 8.1 at devs who dare
App makers can load it before anyone else, but if they do they're stuck with it
Report: Apple seeking to raise iPhone 6 price by a HUNDRED BUCKS
'Well, that 5c experiment didn't go so well – let's try the other direction'
Feast your PUNY eyes on highest resolution phone display EVER
Too much pixel dust for your strained eyeballs to handle
Rounded corners? Pah! Amazon's '3D phone has eye-tracking tech'
Now THAT'S what we call a proper new feature
Oh no, Joe: WinPhone users already griping over 8.1 mega-update
Hang on. Which bit of Developer Preview don't you understand?
Zucker punched: Google gobbles Facebook-wooed Titan Aerospace
Up, up and away in my beautiful balloon flying broadband-bot
Sony battery recall as VAIO goes out with a bang, not a whimper
The perils of having Panasonic as a partner
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Learn about three of the top mobile application security threats facing businesses today and recommendations on how to mitigate the risk.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
SANS - Survey on application security programs
In this whitepaper learn about the state of application security programs and practices of 488 surveyed respondents, and discover how mature and effective these programs are.