Feeds

MAD Students Union bars 'racist' ZOMBIE PHYSICISTS

Hurtful stereotypical portrayal of undead brain-gobbler community

Build a business case: developing custom apps

Indicating just how deeply the modern zeitgeist has been corrupted by tidal waves of zombie-themed fictional claptrap, it has now been revealed that students' union leaders have decided that zombies are an ethnic minority in need of protection from racism.

The fabulous barrelscraping Daily Mail has the scoop, reporting today on a gobsmacking incident in which a group of physics students at Sheffield University attempted to gain entry to a union bar while made up as zombies.

Bouncers, who had been sternly briefed on the strict students' union policy against racism, denied the faux zombies entry, plainly deeming their costumes and makeup to be abusive to zombies everywhere just as black-and-white minstrel getup would nowadays offend modern taste.

Students Union representatives later appeared to confirm that they did indeed have a policy against hurtful stereotypical portrayal of the undead brain-scoffing shambler community.

"It is positive that our security staff were aware of our anti-racism policy," commented Tom Hastings of Sheffield students' union in political-correctness-gone-mad style.

However Hastings did concede that, while praiseworthy, this particular effort to safeguard the feelings of Sheffield's no doubt large community of nocturnal cannibal contagion sufferers had gone too far.

"On this particular occasion the request to remove the face paint was a mistake and done in error," he said.

Read all about it on the Mail here. ®

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE
Examining the frothy disconnect in indie cafe culture
Ex-Apple man Sam Sung - for it is he - sticks namebadge on eBay
Stump up via tat bazaar, do a good thing for ill kids
Check your Clungene, Irish women warned
Have a quick shufti, you may not be pregnant after all
prev story

Whitepapers

Endpoint data privacy in the cloud is easier than you think
Innovations in encryption and storage resolve issues of data privacy and key requirements for companies to look for in a solution.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Top 8 considerations to enable and simplify mobility
In this whitepaper learn how to successfully add mobile capabilities simply and cost effectively.
Solving today's distributed Big Data backup challenges
Enable IT efficiency and allow a firm to access and reuse corporate information for competitive advantage, ultimately changing business outcomes.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.