Feeds

Dixons risks future of humanity with Star Wars-themed ads

C-3PO and R2D2 campaign will be beamed to hungry aliens

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Dixons has put the future of humanity at risk by beaming a series of ads featuring Star Wars refugees C-3PO and R2-D2 into deep space. The campaign touts its Currys and PCWorld chains.

The electronics chain's latest ads will feature the droid pair - including original C-3PO actor Anthony Daniels - breaking into one of the chain's megastores and examining merchandise ranging from cameras to washing machines to fridge freezers.

Apparently the pair will be "amazed at the brilliant technology on offer". This isn't so out of this world - as far as we remember there were no washing machines, breadmakers or tumble dryers in the Star Wars movies, though we seem to remember Aunt Beru having some kind of '70s-style food processor and veggie steamer.

So far, so advertising coup. However, as part of its effort to broadcast the breadth of its offering to as wide an audience as possible, Dixons is to broadcast the ads into space, with the help of Deep Space Communications.

starwars droids in currys advert

Dixons marketing director Niall O’Keeffe told trade rag Marketing Week: "This is about building our retail brands, not price promotions. We’re a completely different organisation than we were four years ago. This is a symbol of the transformation of Dixons.”

But while the campaign may well be a symbol of the transformation of Dixons for O'Keefe, anyone with a modicum of common sense knows it will also be a symbol of humanity's transformation from argumentative yet mainly free Earth-bound species to the intergalactic equivalent of a bag of pepperami sticks.

Reg readers will immediately understand how it is the height of folly to be broadcasting the human race's existence to all the lizard tailed, uber-intelligent alien races residing in deep space, pondering where to source their next meaty meal.

To highlight the Earth's puny technology while simultaneously hyping its primitive yet expansive range of food processors and microwave cookers just exacerbates the horrendous blunder.

The best we can hope for is that the ads don't feature any actual humanoids and that watching aliens confuse the Lucas droids for actual metallic and not very tasty earthlings, before striking us off their shopping list. ®

Bootnote

Apparently a 60 second director's cut of the ad will be shown during this Saturday's X Factor. Enjoy it. While you can.

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
Chipmaker FTDI bricking counterfeit kit
USB-serial imitators whacked by driver update
Xperia Z3: Crikey, Sony – ANOTHER flagship phondleslab?
The Fourth Amendment... and it IS better
DOUBLE BONK: Testy fanbois catch Apple Pay picking pockets
Users wail as tapcash transactions are duplicated
Microsoft to enter the STRUGGLE of the HUMAN WRIST
It's not just a thumb war, it's total digit war
Google Glassholes are UNDATEABLE – HP exec
You need an emotional connection, says touchy-feely MD... We can do that
FTDI yanks chip-bricking driver from Windows Update, vows to fight on
Next driver to battle fake chips with 'non-invasive' methods
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
New hybrid storage solutions
Tackling data challenges through emerging hybrid storage solutions that enable optimum database performance whilst managing costs and increasingly large data stores.