Feeds

PARIS furnished with engorgement

Assistant in tight dress fondles powerful squirter

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

The Paper Aircraft Released Into Space (PARIS) team nipped out yesterday to pick up a satisfyingly large bottle of helium: an 80kg steel beast packing a tad over 10 cubic metres of lifting gas.

We'd like to offer a big ta very much to Air Liquide in Valladolid, for cheerfully providing PARIS with a big lift.

Naturally, our glamorous assistant Rui was on hand to pose with the vital supplies and, for a small large consideration, agreed to don a sequin dress in honour of our inspirational celebutard goddess - the heavenly Paris Hilton:

Our glamorous assistant poses with the helium bottle

If that's not enough Friday excitement for you, then you'll certainly enjoy the supplied balloon fill valve. Ms Hilton has in the past, we're sure, handled similarly-shaped objects:

The suggestively-shaped fill valve

So, we've got helium, a main payload and a launch date. We just need a space paper plane and we're ready for lift-off... ®

Additional PARIS resources

  • Our dedicated PARIS section, with all previous updates, is right here.
  • New to PARIS? We have a basic mission summary here (pdf).
  • Our Flickr page, for your viewing pleasure.
  • Check out our YouTube channel - currently featuring a few kit tests.

Intelligent flash storage arrays

More from The Register

next story
FORGET the CLIMATE: FATTIES are a MUCH BIGGER problem - study
Fat guy? Drink or smoke? You're worse than a TERRORIST
Renewable energy 'simply WON'T WORK': Top Google engineers
Windmills, solar, tidal - all a 'false hope', say Stanford PhDs
Rosetta probot drilling DENIED: Philae has its 'LEG in the AIR'
NOT best position for scientific fulfillment
SEX BEAST SEALS may be egging each other on to ATTACK PENGUINS
Boffin: 'I think the behaviour is increasing in frequency'
HUMAN DNA 'will be FOUND ON MOON' – rocking boffin Brian Cox
Crowdfund plan to stimulate Blighty's space programme
Post-pub nosh neckfiller: The MIGHTY Scotch egg
Off to the boozer? This delicacy might help mitigate the effects
I'M SO SORRY, sobs Rosetta Brit boffin in 'sexist' sexy shirt storm
'He is just being himself' says proud mum of larger-than-life physicist
NASA launches new climate model at SC14
75 days of supercomputing later ...
LIFE, JIM? Comet probot lander found 'ORGANICS' on far-off iceball
That's it for God, then – if Comet 67P has got complex molecules
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Internet Security Threat Report 2014
An overview and analysis of the year in global threat activity: identify, analyze, and provide commentary on emerging trends in the dynamic threat landscape.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.