Pope makes central London no-go zone for BT engineers
Net access looking flaky? Start praying
Based in Central London? Broadband looking a little flaky this afternoon?
You better look to heaven for help, as Openreach won't be doing any callouts in the centre of Capital for the foreseeable future due to Pope-related congestion.
That apparently is the gospel according to telecoms provider 2Circles, which told customers that Openreach had said it would not be taking "any escalations for faults and orders in the London area next week due to the visit of the Pope".
This apparently applies to orders requiring an engineer visit. We assume this is because of the inevitable road closures and subsequent congestion as the walking pace Popemobile prowls the streets of the capital as radical atheists and hard core Opus Dei members try to drown each out, while the Swiss Guards try to stop Peter Tatchell from arresting the pontiff.
Alternatively, Openreach could be taking heed of His Holiness' injunctions against the tide of filth available over the internet, and is looking to make Westminster a porn-free zone, albeit for just a few days.
Sadly, if you thought you get round it by engaging a papally approved ISP, you're out of luck, as Catholic Internet Services only operates in the US.
We asked Openreach and 2Circles to confirm the bulletin, but so far they haven't got back for us. ®
Missing the point!
Forget all this holiness, religious debate and BT engineering. What I want to know is - is the old bugger paying the congestion charge?
Um, I might be a dumb European
We don't stop traffic for politicians, stars, the wealthy , the poor..
So why should we afford this old twat such a lot of reverence?
> He doesn't speak for God - the bible states clearly that nobody on earth is receiving personal messages, in fact even the disciples didn't get to speak to JC after he ascended.
> He openly approves of pedophilia - witness his inability to keep his own clergy away from the altar boys and runaways; reshuffling his 'misguided servants of God' to different areas when they're caught
> He openly discriminates against women - witness the ease with which women are ordained to the ministry.
> He openly glorifies himself above God - witness the pomp and ceremony that accompanies his every move
> He openly makes himself 'part of this world, having earthly bindings and trappings'. Yes that's from the bible folks; witness the opulence he surrounds himself with
> among many other points.
So again, I ask.. why should he get such reverence??
As BT excuses go it's not bad
Following in their legendary series of ..
We would open up local ADSL to competitors but we don't have the address of our exchanges.
We needa subsidy to install ADSL in a village 2mi from Cambridge science park because it wouldn't be commercially viable
We didn't realise phorm invaded privacy.
Now we just have - wrong sort of religious leader on the roads.