Feeds

Steve Jobs carried 'ninja throwing stars' in hand luggage

Ellison faces challenge for silicon samurai mantle?

The Power of One Brief: Top reasons to choose HP BladeSystem

Updated Steve Jobs has vowed never to visit Japan again after being prevented from leaving the country with a set of ninja throwing stars, according to a local magazine.

The Apple CEO apparently had a set of shuriken in his carry-on luggage when he was returning from a family vacation by private jet in July, according to SPA magazine via a Bloomberg report. They were picked up by a security scan and officials insisted he give them up.

Jobs apparently took umbrage at the request, arguing, quite logically, that it was hardly a security risk as he was unlikely to hijack his own plane.

When officials refused to budge, he apparently threw the death stars away - presumably very slowly so as not to kill anyone - and declared he would not return to the country.

While this could be simply an airport misunderstanding there could be darker issues at play.

For years people have wondered at how Apple enforces a culture of silence amongst both employees and suppliers. It was assumed that this was a result of rigorous NDAs. But perhaps Jobs' hitherto secret intimate knowledge of pressure points and arcane oriental weaponry may play a factor.

Alternatively maybe Steve is sick of Oracle boss Larry Ellison's cod samurai schtick, and has decided to answer back in kind. Presumably Ellison has taken on the tennis playing ex-HP chief Mark Hurd for his lightning quick reactions to fast moving objects as much as his ability to cut costs while spearheading a convincing mid-range computing offering.

We asked Apple to confirm if Jobs was indeed a ninja master or aficionado of one of the more respectable arts - aiki-jujitsu for example. So far we haven't had a reply, but should a black-clad spokesninja scale Vulture Towers before pinning a statement to our chest with a throwing star and then disappearing in a puff of smoke, we'll let you know. ®

Update

According to John Paczkowski at Digital Daily, Apple has issued a statement calling the Jobsian shuriken saga "pure fiction." Not only that, but in an apparent effort to ease any bilateral tensions that may have arisen due to this now-identified-as-fictional incident, Apple also noted: "Steve had a great time and hopes to visit Japan again soon.”

The smart choice: opportunity from uncertainty

More from The Register

next story
NSA man: 'Tell me about your Turkish connections'
Spooks ask Dabbsy to suggest a nice hotel with pool
Russia sends SEX-CRAZED GECKOS to SPAAAAACE!
In space... no one can hear you're green...
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
prev story

Whitepapers

Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
Application security programs and practises
Follow a few strategies and your organization can gain the full benefits of open source and the cloud without compromising the security of your applications.
How modern custom applications can spur business growth
Learn how to create, deploy and manage custom applications without consuming or expanding the need for scarce, expensive IT resources.
Securing Web Applications Made Simple and Scalable
Learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.