It's alive! Duke Nukem Forever breaks out of vapour trail
Balls of steel, baby, balls of steel!
Duke Nukem Forever is the video games world's equivalent of the flying car: mothballed in the garage.
Twelve years in the making, this infamous slice of vapourware is set to for release in 2011. Really.
Take-Two Interactive, the publisher, even issued a press release today announcing its impending release so it must be true. And attendees at the Penny Arcade Expo in Seattle this weekend can get to play with a finished, but "unpolished" version.
What will they see?
Pig cops, alien shrink rays and enormous alien bosses won't stop our hero from accomplishing his one and only goal: to save the world, save the babes and to be a bad-ass while doing it. The King of All Shooters is back with over-the-top weapons, massive aliens and unprecedented levels of interactivity. This game puts pedal to the metal and tongue firmly in cheek, among other places. Shoot hoops, lift weights, read adult magazines, draw crude messages on whiteboards or ogle one of the many beautiful women that populate Duke's life; that is if you can pull yourself away long enough from kicking ass and taking names. Duke Nukem was and will forever be immortalized in gaming history, and this is his legend.
Last year, 3D Realms, the studio responsible for making this first person shooter fly, went bust after spending 10 years on the project. Gearbox took over and has licked Duke Nukem Forever into shape on PS3, XBox 360 and Window PC formats.
Gearbox is rather pleased with how it's doing. Say studio boss Randy Pitchford: "I am thrilled to be in a position with the trust, power and means to make it happen. Am I crazy? Balls of steel, baby, balls of steel!"
In which part of the world is it the equivalent of April Fools Day today?
I have a PS3 and a PC, and I'll be getting the console version. And I'm old enough to remember Duke Nukem games before they went 3D.
There are too many issues with high end PC games these days. At least with the console you know it'll work out of the box without driver issues, insane system requirements and DRM-from-hell. (Plus, once all my games are console versions, I can finally get rid of Windows).
PS3, XBox 360 and Window PC formats
Eh? What about the ZX Spectrum, VIC-20, and Jupiter Ace versions that were originally announced?
It will kinda kill some of the jokes, though.
DNF will actually be released before everyone's transitioned to IPv6.
But then again, Starcraft 2 actually got released before DNF.
The really good joke is that there's a pretty good chance that most current-gen console owners have never, ever heard about Duke Nukem.
On one hand, I want more of the Duke just as I remember him; on the other, not being able to use DNF as the benchmark for infinity will be hard to adjust to.