Feeds

Kim Jong-Il in radish inspection shocker

Military experts analyse Nork nutter vegetable encounter

Remote control for virtualized desktops

The Telegraph has today answered those most pressing questions of the age: just what does Kim Jong-Il inspecting a radish look like, and when he inspects a radish, what conclusion can be drawn from the encounter?

Kim Jong-Il inspects radish on Telegraph front pageThat conclusion, the paper explains, is that experts have suggested that North Korea's entire military machine is fuelled by radishes. This, of course, is a rare delicacy which the impoverished nation's hungry population can only dream of, as they chew boiled army surplus boot leather.

Naturally, such significant news demands a top-quality headline, and the Telegraph has, let's face it, pulled out all the stops to tell it like it is.

What it doesn't make clear, however, is whether the radish in question gained the Nork nutter's approval.

What's more likely, judging by his expression, is that the country's radish growers can expect an extended holiday in the country's salt mines. Expect further in-depth analysis as this breaking story develops. ®

Bootnote

As we speak, North Korea's plucky footballers are heading for defeat at the hands of Portugal. We suspect it'll be radishes all round when they get home, having acquitted themselves well in the World Cup. England, on the other hand, can consider themselves lucky they don't work for Kim Jong-Il, who'd probably have them all shot.

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

More from The Register

next story
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
Bible THUMP: Good Book beats Darwin to most influential tome title
Folio Society crowns fittest of surviving volumes
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
U wot? Silicon Roundabout set to become Silicon U-BEND
Crap-spouting London upstarts to get permanent road closure
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Getting started with customer-focused identity management
Learn why identity is a fundamental requirement to digital growth, and how without it there is no way to identify and engage customers in a meaningful way.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Internet Security Threat Report 2014
An overview and analysis of the year in global threat activity: identify, analyze, and provide commentary on emerging trends in the dynamic threat landscape.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.