NZ spider objects to Canadian's todger
Skinny-dip ends badly for North Island tourist
A Canadian tourist who decided to take a quick nap on a NZ beach following a skinny-dip ended up seriously hospitalised after a venomous spider bit his penis, Oz's The Age reports.
The unnamed 22-year-old awoke after his kip in the North Island's northern extremity to find his penis "swollen and painful with a red mark on the shaft suggestive of a bite".
Reporting in the NZ Medical Journal, Dr Nigel Harrison elaborates: "He rapidly developed generalised muscle pains, fever, headache, photophobia and vomiting."
By the time the poor chap made it to Dargaville Hospital, his penis was "severely swollen, his blood pressure was up and his heart racing".
The next morning, the victim developed "chest pain and other symptoms", leading doctors to conclude he'd been bitten by a dune-dwelling katipo spider - a rare but nasty piece of work related to Australian redbacks and North American black widow spiders.
Cue administration of anti-venom, but the man's heart symptoms persisted, requiring further treatment in Whangarei and Auckland hospitals before he was able to return to his native land. ®
The katipo, meaning "night-stinger" in Maori, apparently attacks "only in self-defence"...
The fear of being pictured by StreetView while you're lying naked on the beach with a swollen penis.
...I believe the only course of action is to suck out the poison....
This is one article
that I won't be asking for
"pics, or it never happened"