Feeds

Billy Connolly invades TomTom (for £8.99)

No swearing, no dirty bits

Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk

We love Billy Connolly - but listening to the foul-mouthed comic day-in, day-out as the satnav voice in the car? That could be too much, even for diehards like us.

Today, the Big Yin joins the line-up of voices available to TomTom's 40 million users across Europe. They can download Billy's voice at http://www.tomtom.com/billyconnolly and listen to his jocular tones navigate them to their destination. And there's no swearing, and no impersonation.

Says Billy: "This really is Billy Connolly.  It's not the creepy guy you get on cheap birthday cards.  It's my real voice.  No swearing, no dirty bits, I'll keep you safe".

Billy Connolly smiling - white background

No swearing, no rude bits

Here's a selection of Billy's satnav instructions:

"Make a U turn.  None of this would have been necessary had you been listening a minute ago".

"U turn ahead.  I'll be here when you get back".

"After 300 yards you have reached your destination.  You may thank me and remember that without me none of this would have been possible and you would have been hopelessly lost."

"Toll charge.  I'm only doing my job.  Don't shoot the messenger."

TomTom is building up quite the catalogue of famous voices for the satnav, including John Cleese, SnoopDogg, Burt Reynolds, Dennis Hopper [and when he's dead? Ed] - Eddie Izzard, Homer Simpson and, weirdly, Sven Goran Eriksson.

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

More from The Register

next story
MARS NEEDS WOMEN, claims NASA pseudo 'naut: They eat less
'Some might find this idea offensive' boffin admits
LOHAN crash lands on CNN
Overflies Die Welt en route to lively US news vid
Comet Siding Spring revealed as flying molehill
Hiding from this space pimple isn't going to do humanity's reputation any good
Experts brand LOHAN's squeaky-clean box
Phytosanitary treatment renders Vulture 2 crate fit for export
No sail: NASA spikes Sunjammer
'Solar sail' demonstrator project binned
Carry On Cosmonaut: Willful Child is a poor taste Star Trek parody
Cringeworthy, crude and crass jokes abound in Steven Erikson’s sci-fi debut
Origins of SEXUAL INTERCOURSE fished out of SCOTTISH LAKE
Fossil find proves it first happened 385 million years ago
Human spacecraft dodge COMET CHUNKS pelting off Mars
Odyssey orbiter yet to report, though - comet's trailing trash poses new threat
prev story

Whitepapers

Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Why and how to choose the right cloud vendor
The benefits of cloud-based storage in your processes. Eliminate onsite, disk-based backup and archiving in favor of cloud-based data protection.
Three 1TB solid state scorchers up for grabs
Big SSDs can be expensive but think big and think free because you could be the lucky winner of one of three 1TB Samsung SSD 840 EVO drives that we’re giving away worth over £300 apiece.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.