Man coughs to sex with donkey and horse
That's not how you make a mule, silly
A 66-year-old man today pleaded guilty in Leicester Crown Court to charges of "buggery of a donkey between February 2 and February 5, 1999, and buggery of a horse between March 15 and 18, 2004", the Independent reports.
Joseph Squires, formerly of Overpark Avenue, Leicester, also coughed to two charges of damaging property, "relating to the two animals on the same dates".
Defence counsel Amar Mehta requested bail, noting Squires "had no previous convictions and was of previous good character". He rather unfortunately told the court: "The defendant does not have a stable address although he says his daughter can provide an address."
Judge Michael Pert QC was unimpressed, and remanded Squires into custody for a pre-sentencing report. He'll discover his fate on 24 May. ®