Avatards rush to name sprogs Pandora
I christen thee Neytiri Toruk Blockbuster III...
Film fans are reportedly rushing to celebrate world-changing, paradigm-busting 3D celluloid epic Avatar by naming their poor babies after characters from the Film That Changed The World Forever™.
According to a rather sketchy report in the Sun, some parents have inexplicably decided it's a bright idea to name a kid Neytiri or Toruk or indeed Pandora. The latter is top choice in the US, "with UK parents set to follow".
The Sun appears to have got the shock news from blinkbox.com, which suggested that the $1bn box office barrier acts as a trigger for movie-based sprogbranding. A spokesman offered: "Past the $100m barrier, the chances of a film's star lending their name to a child increase."
This remarkable and almost unbelievable fact explains, of course, why priests have in recent years been obliged to utter: "I christen thee Bilbo Dark Knight Barbossa Gollum Jack Sparrow III..." ®
'Spat out at me' is an awfully aggressive-sounding phrase that doesn't quite marry up, in my mind, with the actual process of clicking and reading required for you to absorb this story.
I could work here for a thousand years (and god knows some days it feels like I have already) and I'd never get to the end of you IT-angletards. I can't even be arsed to explain our editorial policy any more - in future, I'm just going to make this sort of droning noise in the back of my nose and leave it at that.
We Avatards are already here!
My mother, God rest her soul, named me K' evin after my Grandfather who was a N'avi and came to this country from from Dubh Linn , a city in a green and pleasant land, to work on the roads.
She also told me that I was a bit blue when I was born. This genetic inheritance usually reveals itself during periods of intense cold.
Mines the one with the lump of Unobtanium in the pocket.
I will let my kids choose their own name.
By putting the newborn in front of a keyboard.
Then if the don't like being called something like "dfsgar" they only have themselves to blame!