Feeds

Women to 'chest drive' Bulgarian airbags

'Simulated breast prosthesis' - sport before you import

The Power of One Brief: Top reasons to choose HP BladeSystem

Women considering going under the knife to boost their assets are being offered the chance to "chest drive"* implants before committing to surgery.

The Hospital Group explains that prior to popping in a pair of top-of-the-range Natrelle breast implants, its surgeons deploy the Biodynamics® Breast Analysis System, which involves an initial measure-up, followed by a "clever breast implant visualisation system" and finally "a specially designed vest, bra and a range of external 'simulated breast prosthesis'".

Handy guide to the Biodynamics Breast Analysis System

The prostheses are apparently a highly sophisticated kind of "chicken fillet", which allow customers to "literally see and feel the difference breast augmentation will make to your body shape".

Once they've fine-tuned their choice, women will be endowed with one of 500 different Natrelle implants, which come in "4 projections, 4 gel types" and, rather disturbingly, "smooth or textured surface". ®

Bootnote

* Can't take the credit for that. Good work by the Sun, as ever.

Eight steps to building an HP BladeSystem

More from The Register

next story
NSA man: 'Tell me about your Turkish connections'
Spooks ask Dabbsy to suggest a nice hotel with pool
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
Russia sends SEX-CRAZED GECKOS to SPAAAAACE!
In space... no one can hear you're green...
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Accused! Yahoo! exec! SUES! her! accuser!, says! sex! harassment! never! happened!
Allegations were for 'financial gain', countersuit claims
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Boost IT visibility and business value
How building a great service catalog relieves pressure points and demonstrates the value of IT service management.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.