Feeds

Taliban attack Brit troops with explosive donkey

'Considerable' blast from asinine IED

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

British troops in Afghanistan's Helmand Province will in future eye donkeys with suspicion after the Taliban strapped an improvised explosive device to an unfortunate beast of burden and sent it "galloping" towards a military camp.

Major Richard Streatfeild, of the 3rd Battalion the Rifles Regiment, said the insurgents had "really outdone themselves" with the four-legged assault in the Sangin Valley. He reported: "Fortunately the gate guard noticed something suspicious when a group of men let the donkey go a short way from the camp and then hurried off.

"He tried to divert the animal but it eventually had to be stopped with a rifle shot. A team went out and realised there was something supicious under the hay."

One soldier set fire to the hay with a flare, the Telegraph explains, provoking a "considerable explosion", but without casualties. Streatfeild said: "No-one was hurt thanks to the swift action taken and they were saved from a very unusual attack."

Streatfeild said Afghan Army soldiers had already tipped off the Brits about the possibility of donkey-borne assaults. This intelligence has top brass worried the Taliban are now resorting to "desperate methods" in their attacks on the occupying forces.

Streatfeild concluded: "It is impossible to report a donkey IED up the chain of command without either a wry smile at the ridiculousness or a feeling that the world is slightly off its axis." ®

Bootnote

God help the Taliban when PETA gets wind of this. Expect a poster campaign with a naked Playboy model astride a visibly-happy donkey, her modesty protected by a strategically-placed AK47, under the persuasive anti-cruelty strapline: "I'd rather go bareback than blow up my ass."

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

More from The Register

next story
Facebook's Zuckerberg in EBOLA VIRUS FIGHT: Billionaire battles bug
US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention contacted as site supremo coughs up
Space exploration is just so lame. NEW APPS are mankind's future
We feel obliged to point out the headline statement is total, utter cobblers
Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)
Over £200 worth of the good stuff up for grabs
Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy
'Tiffany' closes deal - 'it's more common to offer your wife', says agent
Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape
It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
Swiss wildlife park serves up furry residents to visitors
'It's ecological' says spokesman, now how would you like your Bambi done?
The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event
Nerve-shattering run-up to the pre-planned known event
STONER SHEEP get the MUNCHIES after feasting on £4k worth of cannabis plants
Baaaaaa! Fanny's Farm's woolly flock is high, maaaaaan
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
Red Bull does NOT give you wings, $13.5m lawsuit says so
Website letting consumers claim $10 cash back crashes after stampede
prev story

Whitepapers

Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
Win a year’s supply of chocolate
There is no techie angle to this competition so we're not going to pretend there is, but everyone loves chocolate so who cares.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.