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Reg readers reveal their holiday toilet texting plans

Beats staring at the walls

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Don't call your girlfriend from the toilet

"First, I wanted to post anon but then I thought what the heck, there aren't any women on El Reg anyway."

Hey! I'm a girl! And no, not the 'typical' geek girl either - I wear skirts/heels and sometimes even makeup... AND I know what a date is! :)

Mmm, there goes the marketing department's reader demographics research. But please, continue.

Sorry guys, but if we're on a date and you pull out your phone/whatever, you're obviously not that interested in me. There won't be a second date, and unless you're extremely lucky there will be an expedited end to the first one. Unless someone is dying, you can wait to answer it until the date is over. Besides, I can do better.

For those doing it in the bathroom stall, yuck! You put that thing up by your mouth! Voice calls are out of the question. The company I work for makes hotel reservations and you'd be shocked how often I hear "EW! He was in the bathroom!" after somone gets off a call. Really? You couldn't wait to make that call?

Oh, and someone said something about us having a nice little couch in there? No women's bathroom I've ever been in has had a couch. Ever.

Thanks Cowardette. We've always wondered about these mythical couches. But really, you've been on dates in toilets? That's yucky.

Sadly, a few of our readers got the wrong end of the stick, and decided to use it as a toilet brush.

Darren clearly locked himself in the cubicle to consider the issue, and reached right back into... the past.

While working for Symbian, in the early days, we each received a Nokia 7650, a few of us were in the pub when I received an MMS from a collegue with a photo of the pan in trap 1.

Actually, Darren, we think we know where that came from.

WTF?

Oh yeah i txt while sitting on the bog its ok, oops was that the camera , oh shit i just MMSd my dick to my boss again, ah he'll understand he's a great guy, he's been so good to me, man these pills are kickin in hard, fuck what was i doing with my phone again, have i finished with it or was i gonna txt someone...

Which left it to Adam to call on that great tech etiquettist, Douglas Adams.

Those Golgrafrincham phone sanitisers would have had a use afterall!

Thanks Adam. We'd always wondered whether the phone sanitisation industry was a figment of Adams' imagination or not. Now that we know the terrible truth of Reg readers' toilet-based communications, we're going to get the phone sanitisers down to Vulture Central pronto. ®

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