Feeds

Blogger outs back-end Google tech

'Super elastic, soft, smooth. Highly absorbent, for you always!'

High performance access to file storage

A Vietnamese blogger has alerted the world to another Google product.

Details are sketchy at best. In fact, all we have is a photo:

Google Toilet Paper

Another Google product

The photo - whose authenticity has yet to be verified - seems to indicate the product is some sort of "2 ply bathroom paper" made from "100 per cent virgin pulp."

Judging from a bit of Vietnamese captured by the photo - "Thật dai, mềm mại, mịn màng. Độ hút cao, luôn vì bạn!" - the new product is designed to be "Very long, soft, smooth. Of high vacuum, because you always!" At least, that's the word from Google Translate. A Huffington Post reader says the translation is closer to "Super elastic, soft, smooth. Highly absorbent, for you always!"

That's all we know at this point. But since the Google name is attached, you can bet Michael Arrington and TechCrunch will soon run a story claiming the product will take over the world - according to unnamed sources.

From where we're sitting, the Google name would indicate the product will eventually be open sourced in an effort to fool the world into thinking someone other than Google actually has a say in what the thing does. The name is also a sign that although it's billed as "2 ply bathroom paper," it's really just a way to collect more of the world's data and sell more online ads. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to reader Andrew Langhorn for the tip.

High performance access to file storage

More from The Register

next story
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest
New minifigs like Monster Fighters are turning kids to the dark side
Dark SITH LORD 'Darth Vader' joins battle to rule, er, Ukraine
Only I can 'make an empire out of a republic' intones presidential candidate
Chinese company counters pollution by importing fresh air
Citizens line up for bags of that sweet, sweet mountain air
Google asks April Fools: Want a job? Be our 'Pokemon Master'
Mountain View is prankin' like it's 1999...
prev story

Whitepapers

Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
HP ArcSight ESM solution helps Finansbank
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Mobile application security study
Download this report to see the alarming realities regarding the sheer number of applications vulnerable to attack, as well as the most common and easily addressable vulnerability errors.