Feeds

iPhone developer stamps out calculator profanity

5318008, trouble us no longer

Gartner critical capabilities for enterprise endpoint backup

The twisted path that led you to becoming the horrible person you are today probably began when your adolescent mind first realized you could spell "BOOBIES" on an upside-down calculator.

A seven-segment display can harvest more civilized output like "thesis," "legible," or even "Othello" – yet somehow you couldn't resist the cheap laugh with a word problem arranged to land on 58008 or one of its titular derivatives. Numerous studies have proven that pornographic, adult-rated material, when consumed by impressionable kids, can have untoward, sometimes dangerous behavioral consequences.

Yet we, as a society, ignore a scheme conveniently upheld by calculator makers for decades that twists innocent minds with rude words and vulgar fractions.

Families today are under siege by Big Calculator corporate interests aimed at mentally molesting minors for money – and only one iPhone developer has the floating points to stop them. James Thomson, the creator of PCalc has premiered bleeding-edge calculator censorship technology that detects when the iPhone is turned upside down with a potentially abased readout.

Behold:

We applaud your public-spirited act of self-promotion, Thomson. A single child saved from a devilishly entertaining math problem is more than worth the effort. ®

5 things you didn’t know about cloud backup

More from The Register

next story
MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS
'Prettier, better organised, more harmonious than if men were in charge'
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
prev story

Whitepapers

Top 10 endpoint backup mistakes
Avoid the ten endpoint backup mistakes to ensure that your critical corporate data is protected and end user productivity is improved.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Backing up distributed data
Eliminating the redundant use of bandwidth and storage capacity and application consolidation in the modern data center.
The essential guide to IT transformation
ServiceNow discusses three IT transformations that can help CIOs automate IT services to transform IT and the enterprise
Next gen security for virtualised datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.