Feeds

Average Brit shags 2.8m people

'Sex Degrees of Separation'

The smart choice: opportunity from uncertainty

The average Brit shags 2.8m people during his or her lifetime, albeit indirectly, according to a handy "Sex Degrees of Separation" calculator from Lloyds Pharmacy.

According to the Telegraph, the calculator uses data gleaned from 6,000 British adults, with blokes on average boasting nine sexual partners, and women 6.3 lovers.

Users are invited to enter their total number of conquests, and the age range for each - no mean feat of memory if you've put it about a bit. The calculator then "uses its database to work out how many previous sexual partners people within that age range have had on average".

This process is repeated for five further "generations", giving the Sex Degrees of Separation and summarised by the total number of "indirect and direct sexual partners".

In case you're wondering just what purpose this serves - apart from breathing new life into the traditional Monday morning office banter - "Get lucky over the weekend?" "Yeah, indirectly rogered three thousand, four hundred and eleven people on Saturday night" - Lloyds Pharmacy's sexual health supremo, Clare Kerr, can enlighten:

"When we have sex with someone, we are, in effect, not only sleeping with them, but also their previous partners and their partners' previous partners, and so on. It's important that people understand how exposed they are to sexually transmitted diseases and take appropriate precautions including using condoms and having checks when necessary."

Said checks might include (and here comes the plug) the £75 Lloyds Pharmacy's Relationship Screen - a postal clap probe which "provides a convenient way for couples to be tested for HIV, genital chlamydia and genital gonorrhoea before committing to full intimacy."

Kerr concluded: "A simple sexual health check will give both partners in a relationship peace of mind. The majority of sexually transmitted diseases are easy to rectify, but if left untreated can have serious implications." ®

Bootnote

We reckon the Relationship Screen is, while a great step forward in avoiding the pox, just about the ultimate passion killer. Her: "I've had a great evening. You know, you can stay the night if you want to..." Him: "Yeah, I really am in the mood to commit to full intimacy, but if you can just provide me with saliva and urine samples, we can pencil in some torrid sex for sometime next week."

And no, we don't know how Lloyds Pharmacy came up with the 2.8m average. We suspect it's just an impressive-looking number designed to lure gullible hacks into writing a story about... Oh, blast.

The Power of One Infographic

More from The Register

next story
World Solar Challenge contender claims new speed record
One charge sees Sunswift travel 500kms at over 100 km/h
SMELL YOU LATER, LOSERS – Dumbo tells rats, dogs... humans
Junk in the trunk? That's what people have
The Sun took a day off last week and made NO sunspots
Someone needs to get that lazy star cooking again before things get cold around here
Boffins discuss AI space program at hush-hush IARPA confab
IBM, MIT, plenty of others invited to fill Uncle Sam's spy toolchest, but where's Google?
Beancounters tell NASA it's too poor to fly planned mega-rocket
Space Launch System would need another $400m and a lot of time
Bad back? Show some spine and stop popping paracetamol
Study finds common pain-killer doesn't reduce pain or shorten recovery
Forty-five years ago: FOOTPRINTS FOUND ON MOON
NASA won't be back any time soon, sadly
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Boost IT visibility and business value
How building a great service catalog relieves pressure points and demonstrates the value of IT service management.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.