Feeds

Good Housekeeping readers play hunt the G-spot

Middle England tickles its stiff upper lips

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

In a final death blow for the values which once made Blighty great - long shadows on cricket grounds, warm beer, invincible green suburbs, dog lovers, triumphant foreign wars, etc, etc - Good Housekeeping has published a reader guide to the top five vibrators.

For its October issue, the "housewives' bible" (as the Telegraph puts it) asked a panel of readers aged between 30 and 65 to spread 'em for the UK's top-selling orgasm assistants. They rated the devices for "ease of use, instructions, noisiness and satisfaction".

The winner was the "Delight", an s-shaped pleasurer*, which scored an impressive 74 out of 100. Next up was the "Bedside Bullet" (68/100), closely followed by an unspecified but promising "warming vibrator".

The famous Rampant Rabbit was fourth, clocking up 61 out of 100. Quite which vibro came fifth, the Telegraph doesn't say, and we're not buying a copy of Good Housekeeping to find out.

In case you're wondering whether the volunteers were reluctantly dragged from their dusting and coffee mornings to lie back and think of England, 87 per cent of testers said they'd already used a vibrator and "52 per cent of testers’ husbands suggested they should try one".

Good Housekeeping deputy ed, June Walton, confirmed that things had indeed changed since the magazine launched back in 1922. She said: “Even though Sex And The City has removed the ‘guilty’ tag from owning a sex toy, and it’s widely recognised that many young, single women own vibrators, our survey discovered that they’re just as popular among our readers - only 13 per cent of our testers were vibrator virgins.” ®

Bootnote

*Manufactured by German sex toy outfit Fun Factory, in case you fancy confirming the Good Housekeeping result.

Choosing a cloud hosting partner with confidence

More from The Register

next story
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
Bible THUMP: Good Book beats Darwin to most influential tome title
Folio Society crowns fittest of surviving volumes
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
U wot? Silicon Roundabout set to become Silicon U-BEND
Crap-spouting London upstarts to get permanent road closure
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
prev story

Whitepapers

Why cloud backup?
Combining the latest advancements in disk-based backup with secure, integrated, cloud technologies offer organizations fast and assured recovery of their critical enterprise data.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Simplify SSL certificate management across the enterprise
Simple steps to take control of SSL across the enterprise, and recommendations for a management platform for full visibility and single-point of control for these Certificates.
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.