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Jailed Phil Spector wigs out on Twitter

When you were in prison did you have a laptop?

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

Legendary record producer and paragon of sanity Phil Spector is apparently Twittering from his prison cell, having been permitted to keep a laptop, but not his wig.

The Telegraph excitedly burbles that the 69-year-old has been kvetching like a good 'un about his new life, earned by fatally shooting the actress Lana Clarkson in 2003, through the medium of the accepted celeb confesso-funnel du jour. Spector - if Spector it truly is - shows admirable mastery of the 140-character form, being suitably pithy, eloquent and philosophical as well as satisfyingly unhinged in his tweets.

Spector, lauded for his lavish 'wall of sound' production technique on such classics as River Deep, Mountain High, sounds understandably unhappy at being banged up for 19 years. According to his Twitter feed, he is coping in his private Los Angeles County Jail cell by listening to the other essential electronic item he has been permitted to hang onto, his iPod (last shuffled to Engelbert Humperdinck) and playing air chess and air poker with his new friend 'Wilson' the cockroach.

He also apparently chats to artist and infamous Beatles catalyst Yoko Ono on Twitter, in English and Japanese. While he boasts 511 followers (a modest count for a celeb), Yoko is the sole Twitterer Spector considers worthy of following.

Some of Spector's frustration has a follicular focus, as he posted on May 30: "Finished reading The Book Of The Damned. About to write an angry letter to the governer [sic] demanding that they return my wig."

While awaiting an emotional reunion with his headgear (perhaps the impressive enormo-fro he was spotted beneath in court), he muses, as might a man with time on his hands and a lot on his conscience, as to how his family background may have influenced his character and the course of his life. "My mother and father were first cousins. I don't know genetically whether or not that has something to do with who I am and what I became."

Other thoughtful posts from Spector include

Spiders represent the devil.

To all intents and purposes I would say I'm probably relatively insane, to an extent.

It's comforting to know that mental health doesn't always mean being happy. If it did, nobody would qualify.

Despite an erudition and respect for proper English that leaves most Twitterers in the dust, he does succumb to the lure of the lavatorial:

Back soon need a crap.

Which, after all, is what Twitter is all about. ®

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