Feeds

Her Maj honours NZ wizard

Christchurch character conjures up Queen's Service Medal

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

Her Maj Queen Liz II has seen fit to honour NZ's Ian Brackenbury Channell - who's better known in Christchurch as "The Wizard".

The 76-year-old will henceforth be known as The Wizard QSM after securing a Queen’s Service Medal for services to the community, specifically for donning a black cape and hat, hitting Cathedral Square in Christchurch and "synthesising the ideas of famous philosophers" in a one-man revival of the ancient art of rhetoric.

The Wizard is also known locally for "casting various spells, including one to help the Crusaders rugby team, and trying to avoid being counted on Census night", as NZPA puts it.

A shocked Wizard noted that QSMs normally went to those who've excelled at sports or doers of good works, and admitted: "I would be the last person in the world. I am in shock, I still can't believe it. It's not possible, I am not the right sort of person for it.

"I am not a sportsman, I don't do good works. I am just an entertainer who tries to get new ideas across. So maybe someone who has got ideas has done it [nominated me] because I am really an ideas man."

Nonetheless, the confirmed monarchist expressed his satisfaction at the honour, enthusing: "It's lovely to see an award given for someone who has lived essentially a life of putting as much fun as possible into the world and as much thought as possible."

The Wizard QSM expressed the hope that the recognition would convince people he did not spend his time, when not verbally synthesising philosophical concepts, curdling their milk.

He concluded that the QSM would be a potent addition to his arsenal of spell-casting paraphernalia, although he did not elaborate as to how it might be deployed for the good of New Zealand. ®

3 Big data security analytics techniques

More from The Register

next story
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest
New minifigs like Monster Fighters are turning kids to the dark side
Dark SITH LORD 'Darth Vader' joins battle to rule, er, Ukraine
Only I can 'make an empire out of a republic' intones presidential candidate
Chinese company counters pollution by importing fresh air
Citizens line up for bags of that sweet, sweet mountain air
Google asks April Fools: Want a job? Be our 'Pokemon Master'
Mountain View is prankin' like it's 1999...
prev story

Whitepapers

Designing a defence for mobile apps
In this whitepaper learn the various considerations for defending mobile applications; from the mobile application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies needed to properly assess mobile applications risk.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
Five 3D headsets to be won!
We were so impressed by the Durovis Dive headset we’ve asked the company to give some away to Reg readers.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.