Russian blows off ex-boyf's todger with firecrackers
Hard time likely for perp - even harder time guaranteed for victim
A spurned Russian woman whose boyfriend declined to take her hand in marriage responded by blowing off his penis with firecrackers, Mosnews reports.
Victim Alik D. had been shacked up with Kira V. for about two years when she began to suggest that they should tie the knot. Mr D declined, and indicated he'd rather go back to his wife and child.
Ms V suggested a farewell dinner, and following "a hearty meal and some heavy drinking", Alik crashed out. Kira then tied said fireworks to his todger and lit the fuse.
Intensive care operatives are fighting for Alik's life. Kira faces 12 years' hard time - even if her ex survives. ®
Penis now too small?
Don't wanna read too many of these...
Mercifully, my penis has been cut already, with me following the Jewish faith (In principle. I do fuc*k-all on the Sabbath. Isn't that every day of the week?).