Feeds

WiReD UK: ET found in 19 years

Do they know something we don't?

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Reducing the cost and complexity of web vulnerability management

Good news for Reg correspondent aManfromMars - he'll no long be punning alone. WiReD magazine UK editor David Rowan reckons ET will have been discovered within 19 years.

The magazine (re-)launches in Britain next week, with Conde Nast picking up 12 years after it last crashed and burned. Rowan's prediction is part of the pre-publicity. Since the Daily Stenograph is obsessed with ET at the moment - it was the natural place to make this confident claim.

But we think Rowan may know more than he lets on.

Compare this picture of David from his days as editor of the Jewish Chronicle with this picture, which accompanied the Steno! profile yesterday.

One minute he's Mr Bean, the next, ...

Planet Botox calling

So not only do aliens exist - but we know where they're from: the Planet Botox, in the Max Factor galaxy.

Rowan throws us another clue. Despite pitching WiReD as a "magazine of ideas", he disarmingly confesses not to have any ideas of his own. That's not a problem, because he can rely on a higher intelligence.

“The great thing about being editor of WiReD," he tells the Steno!, "is that you can rely on the data and on futurologists rather than on your own flawed opinions, and these people are pretty big. So whatever they collectively agree on is a pretty safe bet.”

Presumably these (cough) "futurologists" are also green, and glow in the dark? Your secret's safe with us, David. ®

Bootnote

El Reg readers welcomed the return of WiReD UK in fine style last year - browse this fabulous selection of cover art created by readers.

 

But of the many fine feature ideas readers suggested, there is one we can look forward to that no one could have predicted. One article features "... renowned writer Alain de Botton driving dumper trucks and JCBs around the DiggerLand theme park."

You can't make it up.

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

More from The Register

next story
WRISTJOB LOVE BONANZA: justWatch sex app promises blind date hookups
Mankind shuffles into the future, five fingers at a time
Every billionaire needs a PANZER TANK, right? STOP THERE, Paul Allen
Angry Microsoftie hauls auctioneers to court over stalled Pzkw. IV 'deal'
Apple's Mr Havisham: Tim Cook says dead Steve Jobs' office has remained untouched
'I literally think about him every day' says biz baron's old friend
Flaming drone batteries ground commercial flight before takeoff
Passenger had Something To Declare, instead fiddled while plane burned
Cops apologise for leaving EXPLOSIVES in suitcase at airport
'Canine training exercise' SNAFU sees woman take home booming baggage
Oi, London thief. We KNOW what you're doing - our PRECRIME system warned us
Aye, shipmate, it be just like that Minority Report
prev story

Whitepapers

Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk
A single remote control platform for user support is be key to providing an efficient helpdesk. Retain full control over the way in which screen and keystroke data is transmitted.
WIN a very cool portable ZX Spectrum
Win a one-off portable Spectrum built by legendary hardware hacker Ben Heck
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Security and trust: The backbone of doing business over the internet
Explores the current state of website security and the contributions Symantec is making to help organizations protect critical data and build trust with customers.