Feeds

WiReD UK: ET found in 19 years

Do they know something we don't?

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

The essential guide to IT transformation

Good news for Reg correspondent aManfromMars - he'll no long be punning alone. WiReD magazine UK editor David Rowan reckons ET will have been discovered within 19 years.

The magazine (re-)launches in Britain next week, with Conde Nast picking up 12 years after it last crashed and burned. Rowan's prediction is part of the pre-publicity. Since the Daily Stenograph is obsessed with ET at the moment - it was the natural place to make this confident claim.

But we think Rowan may know more than he lets on.

Compare this picture of David from his days as editor of the Jewish Chronicle with this picture, which accompanied the Steno! profile yesterday.

One minute he's Mr Bean, the next, ...

Planet Botox calling

So not only do aliens exist - but we know where they're from: the Planet Botox, in the Max Factor galaxy.

Rowan throws us another clue. Despite pitching WiReD as a "magazine of ideas", he disarmingly confesses not to have any ideas of his own. That's not a problem, because he can rely on a higher intelligence.

“The great thing about being editor of WiReD," he tells the Steno!, "is that you can rely on the data and on futurologists rather than on your own flawed opinions, and these people are pretty big. So whatever they collectively agree on is a pretty safe bet.”

Presumably these (cough) "futurologists" are also green, and glow in the dark? Your secret's safe with us, David. ®

Bootnote

El Reg readers welcomed the return of WiReD UK in fine style last year - browse this fabulous selection of cover art created by readers.

 

But of the many fine feature ideas readers suggested, there is one we can look forward to that no one could have predicted. One article features "... renowned writer Alain de Botton driving dumper trucks and JCBs around the DiggerLand theme park."

You can't make it up.

Boost IT visibility and business value

More from The Register

next story
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE
Examining the frothy disconnect in indie cafe culture
prev story

Whitepapers

Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Top 10 endpoint backup mistakes
Avoid the ten endpoint backup mistakes to ensure that your critical corporate data is protected and end user productivity is improved.
Top 8 considerations to enable and simplify mobility
In this whitepaper learn how to successfully add mobile capabilities simply and cost effectively.
Rethinking backup and recovery in the modern data center
Combining intelligence, operational analytics, and automation to enable efficient, data-driven IT organizations using the HP ABR approach.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.