Feeds

UK censors revolt against 'pornalone' ordeal

The loneliness of the long-distance smutwatcher

Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk

Staff from the British Board of Film Classification are inexplicably up in arms about a management move to force them to endure hardcore rumpy-pumpy alone, the Guardian reports.

While we have no doubt there are hundreds of Reg readers - in common with the BBFC's 80 battle-hardened reviewers - willing and able to cast a critical eye over quality celluloid smutmongery in return for cash, the latter have hitherto watched grumble flicks in pairs "because they often contain scenes that many examiners find offensive".

No doubt the granting of an R18 cert, which allows class pr0n (known as "sex works" down at the BBFC, for the record) to be sold in sex shops, requires the presence of a sympathetic soul able to put the kettle on after a particularly robust rogering, but the powers that be reckon they can dispense with 50 per cent of the team and thereby save money.

The "examiners", however, say that "films that are refused an R18 certificate often include scenes that many find disturbing, including sadomasochism and sexual violence", adding that "viewing pornographic content alone will increase the chances of being sexually aroused by the material".

A BBFC spokeswoman offered: "The BBFC is currently consulting staff about a proposal that sex works should also be examined by examiners viewing alone, but only on the basis that an appropriate policy is in place for having works which are particularly problematic or unpleasant viewed by teams. Difficult or unpleasant issues or material are not confined to sex works."*

Mercifully for the BBFC's potential solo fliers, the spokeswoman noted that "sex works are currently examined by teams of two, but ... a final decision on the proposed changes had not been taken". ®

Bootnote

*This is true - I personally watched Paris Hilton in The Hottie and the Nottie while on my own and am still receiving expert counselling.

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
Are you a fat boy? Get to university NOW, you PENNILESS SLACKER
Rotund types paid nearly 20% less than people who didn't eat all the pies
Emma Watson should SHUT UP, all this abuse is HER OWN FAULT
... said an anon coward who we really wish hadn't posted on our website
Japan develops robot CHEERLEADERS which RIDE on BALLS
'Will put smiles on faces worldwide', predicts corporate PR chief
Bruges Booze tubes to pump LOVELY BEER underneath city
Belgian booze pumped from underground
Oz carrier Tiger Air takes terror alerts to new heights
Don't doodle, it might cost you your flight
Amazon: Wish in one hand, Twit in the other – see which one fills first
#AmazonWishList A year's supply of Arran scotch, ta
Let it go, Steve: Ballmer bans iPads from his LA Clippers b-ball team
Can you imagine the scene? 'Hey guys, it's your new owner – WTF is that on your desk?'
Oi, London thief. We KNOW what you're doing - our PRECRIME system warned us
Aye, shipmate, it be just like that Minority Report
prev story

Whitepapers

A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Beginner's guide to SSL certificates
De-mystify the technology involved and give you the information you need to make the best decision when considering your online security options.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.