The Equalizer prowls Albert Square
Wicker man shocker for EastEnders?
Edward Woodward, aka The Equalizer*, Callan, and "The Summerisle Roast Virgin", is set to appear in EastEnders, the BBC reports.
The veteran thesp, who's still treading the boards at 78, will hit the small screen in March as Tommy Clifford for "a specific storyline involving Patrick Trueman which will run for several weeks".
EastEnders big cheese Diederick Santer teased: "On the surface, this is a warm, charming and engaging man but there are other much darker things going on."
The Beeb explains that Tommy "stealthily draws out details of Patrick's past for less than honourable reasons".
Those of you who are not great soap fans can only hope this involves a climactic ending with the cast, writers and producers consigned en masse to the wicker man. I for one would pay two years' licence fee to watch that, and no messing. ®
*A friend of mine had a theory that The Equalizer's trademark coat started at calf-length and grew an inch per episode until it reached the floor, at which point the series ended.
My memory's a bit bit hazy on that detail, but one thing I do recall is another of my mate's assertions: That any damsel in distress taken under The Equalizer's wing with the instruction "you'll be safe here, do not leave the apartment under any circumstances until I get back" was immediately struck with the irresistible desire to go outside for immediate capture by her persecutors.
Ah, they don't write 'em like that any more.
"Your comments are derogatory, rude and quite frankly if i was employing you, you'd be fired. (and yes i have employed people in your role - they have seen fit to be polite to their(our) "clients, readers, members", as you would expect from a professional organisation.)"
do you get paid to read the reg? does your buisness rely on it? is anyone forcing you to read it?
no? good, fuck off then :D
. . . of course it's IT bloody related
Not to disagree with anyone here, but the news about Eastenders is IT related.
As a keen soaps fan who has never missed an episode of anything, I like to be kept up to date with everything (wiv everyfink, as Mr Woodward is going to say) so well done El Reg!
By way of support for my contention about IT: in a recent episode of Cornynation Street, Ken Barlow and his bruvver were mending Ken's bike in the parlour. Somefink wrong wiv the spokes. Had they hooked up the bike to the kind of electronics McLaren is using, diagnosis of the fault would've been much quicker.
Similarly with Emmerdale Barmy and that plane crash last month wot wiped out the cast and a sheep shed. IT related too, it turns out, a software glitch at 36,000 miles (according to the script).
Then there's Crossroads, my favourite, never miss an episode, where the studio set construction would immeasurably benefit from IT input re loads and stresses.
More soap-related IT news please, El Reg!
Edward Woodward is 21.
Where can I send my CV for the position of official Reg readership spokesman?*
*or woman /Eric Idle