Feeds

Wrong kind of winter brings England to a halt

Panic buying in Guildford, enormous c**t stalks Notts

Security for virtualized datacentres

It managed to improve its web service by about 10am - some time after die-hard passengers would have struggled to their local service stations to find that trains were running every two hours if at all.

South West Trains website unavailable

Even the National Rail service succumbed, with online times about as rare as a snowplough on the rail network.

'Failed to Connect' error at National Rail

Mayhem broke out on the roads as Chelsea farmers and extreme sports types realised they didn't actually know how to use their vehicles' four wheel drive and promptly wiped out, blocking whatever roads were open.

Traffic jams around London

Anyone who had made it into London would have found barely any tubes running, and not a bus to be seen. Meanwhile, Heathrow, Stansted and London City airports put up the shutters, while Gatwick was experiencing severe delays.

It was down to the hardy folk up North to sum the situation up, with this bunch taking advantage of Nott’s online network of CCTV cameras to make their point. (Warning - image on next page contains rude word and may not be safe for the more delicate of workplaces.)

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

More from The Register

next story
Facebook's Zuckerberg in EBOLA VIRUS FIGHT: Billionaire battles bug
US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention contacted as site supremo coughs up
Boffins who stare at goats: I do believe they’re SHRINKING
Alpine chamois being squashed by global warming
Space exploration is just so lame. NEW APPS are mankind's future
We feel obliged to point out the headline statement is total, utter cobblers
Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy
'Tiffany' closes deal - 'it's more common to offer your wife', says agent
Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape
It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event
Nerve-shattering run-up to the pre-planned known event
Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)
Over £200 worth of the good stuff up for grabs
STONER SHEEP get the MUNCHIES after feasting on £4k worth of cannabis plants
Baaaaaa! Fanny's Farm's woolly flock is high, maaaaaan
Adorkable overshare of words like photobomb in this year's dictionaries
And hipsters are finally defined as self-loathing. Sort of
prev story

Whitepapers

Cloud and hybrid-cloud data protection for VMware
Learn how quick and easy it is to configure backups and perform restores for VMware environments.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Three 1TB solid state scorchers up for grabs
Big SSDs can be expensive but think big and think free because you could be the lucky winner of one of three 1TB Samsung SSD 840 EVO drives that we’re giving away worth over £300 apiece.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.