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US nuclear bomb lab develops 'self-warming' hand cream

Local owner-operator delighted

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A New Mexico cosmetics entrepreneur has collaborated with a US government nuclear weapons lab to deal with one of the great scourges threatening society today, that of chilly handcream fresh from the jar. The solution: high-tech "personal care lotion" which warms itself up as it is "gently rubbed" on.

According to the Sandia National Laboratory, a cutting-edge project involving local handcream kingpin Kevin Mallory and Sandia's Duane Schneider - "the microencapsulation go-to guy at Sandia" has got on like a house on fire (not literally, unless there were some experimental mishaps we haven't been told about).

Microencapsulation, as its name suggests, involves mixing tiny capsules full of one kind of chemical into another. The two ingredients stay separate until force is exerted, rupturing the capsules and mixing them together. In this case, the two chemicals react to produce heat.

Previously microencapsulation has mainly been used in humdrum apps like scratch-and-sniff, but it seems that the Sandia nuke lab also has need for it on occasion - apparently Schneider's work normally involves "nuclear weapons, alternative energy, and nanoscience programs" rather than potentially spontaneously combustible or even explosive hand cream.

But it seems that in this case America's nuclear sword has been beaten into a delightful soothing self-warming handcream ploughshare, as it were. There's certainly no mention of any embarrassing overheating issues or anything like that.

Mallory describes the assistance of the nuclear bomb boffins as "absolutely fantastic ... I've been thinking about how lucky I am to live in a community where this kind of help is available."

There was no word on any future ointment or lotion with other intriguing capabilities - for instance the ability to start glowing when rubbed on. ®

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