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Portsmouth gets crime-predicting CCTV

Minority Report comes to Southern England

If you’re planning a rowdy night out in Portsmouth soon, then be careful what you get mixed up in. Because the city’s installed Minority Report-style CCTV cameras able to predict crimes before they’ve happened.

Well, kind of. Local Portsmouth paper The News reported this week that the cameras are linked to systems running behaviour-recognition software that watches out for the telltale signs of crime.

These could range from a gang of youths drinking outside a newsagents to small packages being passed between blacked-out BMWs late at night.

However, the cameras aren’t autonomous and simply alert a CCTV operator to a potential crime in the making. From then on it’s up to the operator to decide if they want to call the boys in blue.

Nick Hewitson, Managing Director of Smart CCTV, the company behind the system, claimed that the software’s ability to alert people to a potential crime will mean that “many more scenes are being watched than is normally possible”.

Jason Fazackarley, a Portsmouth Councillor, likened the system to a modern-day night-watchman, but one that never blinks or takes a break.

I wonder what the system triggers will be?

Is the subject Asian? Check.

Is the subject carrying a rucksack ? Check

Are they displaying signs of independent thoughts? Check

BLOOP! BLOOP! BLOOP! TERRORIST ALERT!

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RE: Anyone remember voting for this shit?

It could be worse - you could be living in the surrounding area's of Manchester - that loverly expensive and useless congestion charge idea will be forced through somehow, and if you look at the ring, Stockport and a few other town area's round about will basically be charged for doing nothing more than going to a supermarket in their own town center.... ok, so it's a shite Tesco, but still... it's not like they are even close to crossing into manchester.... might just move back down to Portsmouth anyway, their council works 10 times harder and for less tax per month than Stockport ever could....

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Genius

Excerpt 1:

"However, the cameras aren’t autonomous and simply alert a CCTV operator to a potential crime in the making. From then on it’s up to the operator to decide if they want to call the boys in blue."

Excerpt 2:

"likened the system to a modern-day night-watchman, but one that never blinks or takes a break."

Combined + Truth:

likened the system to a modern-day night-watchman, but one that never blinks or takes a break, that simply alerts the classic-day night-watchman that BLINKS and TAKES BREAKS!

As with all other cameras, if no-ones watching, nothing is seen!

Puzzle:

"modern-day night-watchman" so like a modern-night-watchman

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As a Portsmouth council tax payer...

1. Residents of Portsmouth were not offered a vote on this intrusive idea.

2. There aren't any police available to follow up on anything 'noticed' by this system - try reporting a non 'serious' (i.e. murder) crime and watch the astounding lack of response. I haven't seem a police officer outside a car for years.

3. The word 'reporting' next to The News should be in inverted commas as the local litter tray liner is not renowned for the accuracy, or indeed reality of it's reporting.

4. This is an outrageous waste of my council tax on a par with the 'Penis of Portsmouth' (aka The Spinnaker Tower)

What a f'n stupid waste of time and money.

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Triggers

Well, the couple at number sixteen have started shagging with the curtains open. Better zoom in on that and start recording.

Hey, it's software mimicing human operators after all.

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