Feeds

Serial commentard bitchslaps Reg hack

'Run away you little pansy, the databases are coming'

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Security for virtualized datacentres

FoTW It's a well-known fact that flames are like number 13 buses - you wait ages for one and then a whole load turn up and once.

Yes indeed, following last week's truly exceptional outburst during which certain Reg readers found themselves on the receiving end of some particularly tasty abuse, we have one Aaron Kempf who rather took exception to Chris Williams' piece on counter-terror databases.

Now, we're not even sure that Kempf fully read the article, or even understood it. No matter, that's never been an impediment to an unholy turdspurt. Here's our analyst's first email:

when are you idiots going to discover that there's nothing wrong with a _DATABASE_?

Seriously-- you hippies need to stop smoking pole* and shivering at the though of _ANYONE_ building a database-- for _ANY_ reason.

No wonder Hitler kicked Englands ass in WW2.. until we had to bail you out. You kids are just a bunch of trippers, dude.

Friggin cry babies, oh, no-- the databases are coming, the databases are coming.

You know, I just built a database to keep track of theRegister using fear in order to prevent people from using a database.

I mean.. WTF Is wrong with you guys?

Data Mining is ineffective? THEY ARE NOT USING DATA MINING, THEY NEED SIMPLE REPORTING!!! Data Mining.. Do you even know what it is??

Before we had time to answer, Kempf discharged another email broadside:

Dude seriously-- you dipshits think that anyone building a couple of 'where clauses' in a database is data mining.

It is not.

Run away you little pansy, the databases are coming, the databases are coming!!!

No wonder you guys are no longer a super-power. Super-Powers aren't scared of a fucking database.

Grow some balls kid, and tell your country.. I'm personally tired of my country saving your country, maybe if you weren't scared of a fucking database-- and maybe if you knew what data mining _WAS_ then maybe you'd have a clue.

But building a database does not equate to data mining.

And databases never hurt nobody. Fucking pansy. 'Run away the databases are coming'.

-Aaron

Reducing the cost and complexity of web vulnerability management

Next page: Bootnote

More from The Register

next story
Oi, London thief. We KNOW what you're doing - our PRECRIME system warned us
Aye, shipmate, it be just like that Minority Report
WRISTJOB LOVE BONANZA: justWatch sex app promises blind date hookups
Mankind shuffles into the future, five fingers at a time
Every billionaire needs a PANZER TANK, right? STOP THERE, Paul Allen
Angry Microsoftie hauls auctioneers to court over stalled Pzkw. IV 'deal'
Apple's Mr Havisham: Tim Cook says dead Steve Jobs' office has remained untouched
'I literally think about him every day' says biz baron's old friend
Cops apologise for leaving EXPLOSIVES in suitcase at airport
'Canine training exercise' SNAFU sees woman take home booming baggage
Flaming drone batteries ground commercial flight before takeoff
Passenger had Something To Declare, instead fiddled while plane burned
prev story

Whitepapers

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops
Balancing user privacy and privileged access, in accordance with compliance frameworks and legislation. Evaluating any potential remote control choice.
WIN a very cool portable ZX Spectrum
Win a one-off portable Spectrum built by legendary hardware hacker Ben Heck
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Beginner's guide to SSL certificates
De-mystify the technology involved and give you the information you need to make the best decision when considering your online security options.