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My jubs are real, wails Kim Kardashian

No runaway inflation here, fetching snap proves

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Forget the international financial meltdown - this week's hot news is that foxy minx celebutard, Playboy model and amateur grumble flick performer Kim Kardashian has definitely not indulged in jub enhancement.

The brunette world's answer to "One Night In" Paris Hilton was moved to counter scurrilous suggestions that her not inconsiderable chesticles had benefited from the surgeon's deft touch. Specifically, one fan asked: "Can you please let us know what cosmetic surgeries you have done? I am assuming breast implants and lip injections. Perhaps more, but that doesn’t matter. I would like to know because, well first, doesn’t everyone?"

Well, yes we do. In response, Ms Kardashian has posted a fetching snap on her blog.

She explains: "This is a picture of me when I was about 14 years old in a bikini. I hope after seeing this you guys will never ask me a plastic surgery question again! I have had a size C since I was 11 years old! So one day I will definitely get a lift, but I am waiting until after I have kids. Until then I rely on a great supportive bra! LOL!"

In related Kardashian news, Kim yesterday revealed her new-look bedroom, described as "old Hollywood glam" and featuring a back wall created entirely from antique mirrors.

Indeed, so impressive is the makeover that one interior design analyst was moved to comment: "Hi I'm famous because I had sex on camera with some no-talented hack. With two wars and a financial crisis who gives a shit about Kim whatever's bedroom. You people are pathetic she's a wh0re. Kim do something that involves talent. Or play in traffic. Either one is good." ®

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