Feeds

Those old timer sign results in full

And the winners are...

Remote control for virtualized desktops

It's hats off to you, our beloved readers, for your massive response to our challenge to create an "Elderly people" sign to replace the current couple of cripples hobbling down to the bingo - an image which doesn't much impress campaigning old timers organisation Age Concern.

UK elderly persons road signWell, it's taken us a while to sift through your contributions, and we'd like to thank you all for your exertions. Below you'll find our pick of the crop, leading ultimately to the winners. Obviously, we couldn't run all the submissions, so don't take umbrage if yours isn't featured.

Firstly, we have a bunch of suggestions which wholeheartedly failed to embrace the concept of being a bit kinder to wrinklies. Many of you, including Captain Daft, suggested that senior citizens are in fact cantankerous warmongers behind the wheel of battery-driven chariots of death:

Old person in mobility scooter threatens running children with stick

Here are some more completely unnecessary digs at old codgers, courtesy of (l-r) Kae Verens, Steve Muir, Maryn Wynn and Donald Stewart:

A montage of four signs

Yup, that last one leads us nicely on to the inevitable:

Four variations on the 'coffin dodger' theme

Well, Richard, Colin Barfoot, Lee Tuckwell and Peter Cranch - you just couldn't stop yourselves, could you? Mind you, neither could Jeff Davies and Niall Roche, who caught our eye with these:

Two further variations on the 'coffin dodger' theme

Onwards. Here are a few efforts from the "stick a picture of an old timer on a sign" line of attack:

Three signs featuring, among others, Cliff Richard

Nice, but we can't help but feel Allan Weaver, Ants Murdoch and Richard Cain haven't fully addressed the copyright/royalties issues there. The idea of slapping an extra 20p on a gallon of petrol just to fund Sir Cliff's retirement is enough to make the average Vauxhall-Corsa-driving septuagenarian's blood boil.

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

More from The Register

next story
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Google's whois results say it's a lousy smut searcher
Run whois google.com or whois microsoft.com. We dare you, you PIG◙◙◙◙ER
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
prev story

Whitepapers

Seattle children’s accelerates Citrix login times by 500% with cross-tier insight
Seattle Children’s is a leading research hospital with a large and growing Citrix XenDesktop deployment. See how they used ExtraHop to accelerate launch times.
Why CIOs should rethink endpoint data protection in the age of mobility
Assessing trends in data protection, specifically with respect to mobile devices, BYOD, and remote employees.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Protecting against web application threats using SSL
SSL encryption can protect server‐to‐server communications, client devices, cloud resources, and other endpoints in order to help prevent the risk of data loss and losing customer trust.