Red Devil assaults Burnley FC's stadium roof
Pre-match entertainment ends in 'major embarrassment'
Burnley FC has suspended all pre-match entertainments at its Turf Moor stadium after a member of the elite Red Devils parachute team performed an unscheduled assault on the roof of the ground's David Fishwick stand, the BBC reports.
In what Burnley described as a "major embarrassment", kick-off of Saturday's clash with Ipswich's Tractor Boys was delayed for an hour while emergency services "assured the safety" of the errant Para. A club statement explained: "Burnley FC tried to lay on some unique pre-match entertainment for the start of the season with the aim of making the first home game a spectacle.
"Unfortunately the Red Devils descent went sadly wrong and a parachutist landed on the roof of the David Fishwick Stand. The Red Devils, who are holding their own investigation, have accepted responsibility and informed the club that the incident was down to individual error.
"The organisation has also waived their fee and given the club and its fans their sincere apologies. The error made by the individual concerned had a significant impact on the match and caused major embarrassment to Burnley Football Club."
Fans of the Red Devils will recall the recent unseemly spat between the Parachute Regiment and our own Lewis Page - provoked by the hack's unfavourable comparison of the Maroon Machine's display outfit and flying Italian minxes the Shooting Stars.
This prompted one enraged Para to ill-advisedly demand: "Ask them [the Italian space babes] if they want to exit the aircraft from 3000 ft build a try by side downplane fly it vertically at the ground till 300 ft then land on a cross inside a stadium." ®
Yellow card issued
its not that bad, but we make the news for the wrong reasons all too often. This however was completely out of the control of anyone from Burnley, so.. we're quite happy for it to be in the news, because it wasn't our fault :D
although.. Burnley would be a lot better without the chavs who call you scum for not giving them a quid to go and buy smack with when you've just come back from a place where people are as nice to you as they are in Bristol.. not that I favour the welsh particularly, just, they dont threaten to beat you up for your money as much... well must go, it's time for my bin to be put out for its once fortnightly collection.. no doubt to be pushed over by chavs that climb over the [VERY poorly designed] gates the council provided on our back street, which actually look like you're meant to climb over them, not that this has any relevance to the incident at turf moor, but I thought i would get some council bashing in.. what did the council ever do for us?
..Ahh yes.. Burnley...
OK, own up...
Who moved the cross?