Feeds

Red Devil assaults Burnley FC's stadium roof

Pre-match entertainment ends in 'major embarrassment'

Beginner's guide to SSL certificates

Burnley FC has suspended all pre-match entertainments at its Turf Moor stadium after a member of the elite Red Devils parachute team performed an unscheduled assault on the roof of the ground's David Fishwick stand, the BBC reports.

In what Burnley described as a "major embarrassment", kick-off of Saturday's clash with Ipswich's Tractor Boys was delayed for an hour while emergency services "assured the safety" of the errant Para. A club statement explained: "Burnley FC tried to lay on some unique pre-match entertainment for the start of the season with the aim of making the first home game a spectacle.

"Unfortunately the Red Devils descent went sadly wrong and a parachutist landed on the roof of the David Fishwick Stand. The Red Devils, who are holding their own investigation, have accepted responsibility and informed the club that the incident was down to individual error.

"The organisation has also waived their fee and given the club and its fans their sincere apologies. The error made by the individual concerned had a significant impact on the match and caused major embarrassment to Burnley Football Club."

Fans of the Red Devils will recall the recent unseemly spat between the Parachute Regiment and our own Lewis Page - provoked by the hack's unfavourable comparison of the Maroon Machine's display outfit and flying Italian minxes the Shooting Stars.

This prompted one enraged Para to ill-advisedly demand: "Ask them [the Italian space babes] if they want to exit the aircraft from 3000 ft build a try by side downplane fly it vertically at the ground till 300 ft then land on a cross inside a stadium." ®

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
Boffins who stare at goats: I do believe they’re SHRINKING
Alpine chamois being squashed by global warming
Space exploration is just so lame. NEW APPS are mankind's future
We feel obliged to point out the headline statement is total, utter cobblers
Down-under record: Australian gets $140k for pussy
'Tiffany' closes deal - 'it's more common to offer your wife', says agent
Internet finally ready to replace answering machine cassette tape
It's a simple message and I'm leaving out the whistles and bells
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
The iPAD launch BEFORE it happened: SPECULATIVE GUFF ahead of actual event
Nerve-shattering run-up to the pre-planned known event
Win a year’s supply of chocolate (no tech knowledge required)
Over £200 worth of the good stuff up for grabs
STONER SHEEP get the MUNCHIES after feasting on £4k worth of cannabis plants
Baaaaaa! Fanny's Farm's woolly flock is high, maaaaaan
Adorkable overshare of words like photobomb in this year's dictionaries
And hipsters are finally defined as self-loathing. Sort of
Not a loyal follower of @BritishMonarchy? You missed The QUEEN*'s first Tweet
Her Maj opens 'Information Age' at the Science Museum
prev story

Whitepapers

Choosing cloud Backup services
Demystify how you can address your data protection needs in your small- to medium-sized business and select the best online backup service to meet your needs.
Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.