Feeds

Suprise at spelling snafu sanctions

University lecturer waves through wonky wordage

Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction

Proof that the revised maxim "If you can't beat 'em, fuck it all off and have some pie" is increasingly the norm reaches us today, as a senior university lecturer throws his hands aloft and declares a spelling amnesty. According to the Times, Dr Ken Smith of Buckinghamshire New University* suggests a list of 20 common mistakes should be waved through as 'variants'.

Smith is ostensibly voicing a plea for some logic to be applied to the notoriously mercurial English spelling system, but seems chiefly concerned with saving time and reducing hair-tearing for tutors beleaguered by constant balls-ups from students. The criminology lecturer, writing in the Times Higher Education mag, said: "Teaching a large first-year course at a British university, I am fed up with correcting my students' atrocious spelling. Aren't we all?

"But why must we suffer? Instead of complaining about the state of the education system as we correct the same mistakes year after year, I've got a better idea."

His dastardly plot is to loosen things up for 20 commonly-misspelt English words and allow alternative spellings such as "truely", "wierd" and "speach". The Times also informs us, as we peer at it through our trembling fingers, that Smith proposes the "their/thier" issue should be resolved by simplification.

"Why not just drop the word their altogether in favour of there?" he asks, as horns no doubt sprout from his brow. "It does not make any difference to the meaning of a sentence if you spell 'their' as 'thier' or 'there', so why insist on 'their'?" (All very well, Dr Smith, but where does that leave "they're", eh? Where?)

In a move guaranteed to perturb some Reg commenters**, Dr Smith also put forward the idea that we shouldn't fuss overmuch about the difference between "queue", "cue" and "Kew".

Naturally Smith's proposals will see a renewal of the huffings and puffings over school literacy standards. We at the Reg can only concur that education is lacking, but would suggest Dr Smith shelve his craven appeasement plans and consider introducing corporal punishment for his mother-tongue-mangling studes. Clearly, it's the only language they understand. ®

Bootnotes

* Buckingham New University runs a site about higher education for 11-16 year-olds called Be Coz U Can. An excellent start.

** Anyone correcting our deliberate (as in the headline) misspelling, or indeed our accidental misspelling, will be cast onto the barbecue.

Top three mobile application threats

More from The Register

next story
Och aye! It's the Loch Ness Monster – but only Apple fanbois can see it
Fondleslab-friendly beastie's wake spotted... OR WAS IT?
Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise
Not exactly attractive to the Israeli tourist demographic
Sleuths find nosy NORKS drones on the Chinternet
UAVs likely to have been made in the Middle Kingdom
Oz bank in comedy Heartbleed blog FAIL
Bank: 'We are now safely patched.' Customers: 'You were using OpenSSL?'
Dorian Nakamoto gets $23,000 payout over Bitcoin invention saga
Maintains he didn't create cryptocurrency, but will join community
Japanese boffin EYES up big bucks with strap-on digi-glasses
AgencyGlass saddles user with creepy OLED display
Forget the beach 'n' boardwalk, check out the Santa Cruz STEVE JOBS FOUNTAIN
Reg reader snaps shot of touching tribute to Apple icon
Happy 40th Playmobil: Reg looks back at small, rude world of our favourite tiny toys
Little men straddle LOHAN, attend tiny G20 Summit... ah, sweet memories...
prev story

Whitepapers

Mobile application security study
Download this report to see the alarming realities regarding the sheer number of applications vulnerable to attack, as well as the most common and easily addressable vulnerability errors.
3 Big data security analytics techniques
Applying these Big Data security analytics techniques can help you make your business safer by detecting attacks early, before significant damage is done.
The benefits of software based PBX
Why you should break free from your proprietary PBX and how to leverage your existing server hardware.
Securing web applications made simple and scalable
In this whitepaper learn how automated security testing can provide a simple and scalable way to protect your web applications.
Combat fraud and increase customer satisfaction
Based on their experience using HP ArcSight Enterprise Security Manager for IT security operations, Finansbank moved to HP ArcSight ESM for fraud management.