NZ judge saves girl from bloody silly name
Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii
An NZ judge has done the decent thing and made a nine-year-old girl a ward of court to allow her to ditch what must rate among the most preposterous names of all time - Talula Does The Hula From Hawaii.
The issue of the poor child's moniker surfaced during a custody hearing in New Plymouth back in February, the BBC reports. The victim of parental poor judgement had apparently refused to tell her chums her real name, and went simply by the initial "K".
Judge Rob Murfitt declared: "The court is profoundly concerned about the very poor judgment which this child's parents have shown in choosing this name. It makes a fool of the child and sets her up with a social disability and handicap, unnecessarily."
Accordingly, the court resolved the custody issue and allowed Talula to adopt a sensible title, which is not noted.
NZ's Registrar-General Brian Clarke explained to AP that the country "does not allow names that would cause offence or that are longer than 100 characters", and that officials "often tried to talk parents out of particularly unusual choices that could embarrass their offspring".
The Beeb cites several successful blocks, including Cinderella Beauty Blossom, Fat Boy, Fish and Chips (twins), Keenan Got Lucy, Sex Fruit, Stallion, Twisty Poi and Yeah Detroit.
However, the powers that be did, inexplicably, allow Benson and Hedges (also twins, naturally), Midnight Chardonnay, Number 16 Bus Shelter* and Violence.
* Yup, that's got to be where the poor sprog was conceived.
How about the "Schools Minister" here in Britain? Ed Balls, I bet lots of kids got a laugh at that.
Also, and I bet this was completely unintentional since he was not young by any stretch of the imagination, I knew of a guy by the name of Alan Keys. Someone should have got shot for that.
@Dan Clarke -- re. Gordon Brown
Interesting -- I didn't know that our belovèd (as in "erm, I think I've heard of him") PM's full name was "James Gordon Brown"; now that I do, I can imagine why he chooses to be known by his middle name. I reckon that his schooldays must have been hell, with wiseguy kids asking about his Dad's brand new bag or if he feels like being a sex machine. :-)
Icon says it all really...
@AC Re: Thundergods
Bet you were a Mortal Kombat fan then.