Feeds

Croydon devil dog execution: Exclusive photo

Woof, woof, bang, thud

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

The shocking case earlier this week of the Croydon devil dog - shot dead by armed officers after unsportingly failing to succumb to a robust tasering - provoked a flurry of reader emails demanding El Reg provide the now traditional CCTV evidence of the incident.

Well, it took us a while, but we did manage to track down this explicit still showing the exact moment at which the satanic Staffordshire bull terrier hit the dirt:

Our artist's impression of how the Croydon devil dog execution may have looked

As you can see, the malevolent mutt managed to administer canine jaw-based justice to two coppers before popping off to the great dangerous dog pound in the sky. The mutt's 13-year-old owner, meanwhile, has decided to accept a cuffing in lieu of hot lead, and has ditched his traditional Saarf London arsenal of automatic pistol, cutlass and antique sword.

In the excitement, however, the Met's finest have once again failed to notice Optimus Prime, who's just come from Lunar House where immigration officials revoked his indefinite leave to remain in the UK following the complete destruction of Heathrow's flagship Terminal Five.

Suffice it to say, Lunar House won't be processing any visa applications for a while, and Mr Prime is now making his way to the Whitgift shopping centre to make similarly short work of that architecturally-lauded centre of consumerism. ®

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
MEN: For pity's sake SLEEP with LOTS of WOMEN - and avoid Prostate Cancer
And, um, don't sleep with other men. If that's what worries you
Jim Beam me up, Scotty! WHISKY from SPAAACE returns to Earth
They're insured for $1m, before you thirsty folks make plans
Now: The REAL APPLE NEWS you need to know
OMG! Gravity's totes amazeballs. Calm down, George Clooney, not your film
Boffins who stare at goats: I do believe they’re SHRINKING
Alpine chamois being squashed by global warming
Let's make an app that POSTS your POO to APPLE HQ
Plus: It's OPEN WARFARE in the Linux greybeard world
FedEx helps deliver THOUSANDS of spam messages DIRECT to its Blighty customers
Don't worry Wilson, I'll do all the paddling. You just hang on
Adorkable overshare of words like photobomb in this year's dictionaries
And hipsters are finally defined as self-loathing. Sort of
Not a loyal follower of @BritishMonarchy? You missed The QUEEN*'s first Tweet
Her Maj opens 'Information Age' at the Science Museum
prev story

Whitepapers

Why and how to choose the right cloud vendor
The benefits of cloud-based storage in your processes. Eliminate onsite, disk-based backup and archiving in favor of cloud-based data protection.
Forging a new future with identity relationship management
Learn about ForgeRock's next generation IRM platform and how it is designed to empower CEOS's and enterprises to engage with consumers.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
Simplify SSL certificate management across the enterprise
Simple steps to take control of SSL across the enterprise, and recommendations for a management platform for full visibility and single-point of control for these Certificates.