Feeds

What hell hath science wrought lately?

A quick guide to man's abominations

Protecting against web application threats using SSL

In the beginning, things were simple. That's arguably because people were far more stupid, but let's not split hairs.

The point is, along came scientists with their fancy protractors, Bunsen burners and diesel-powered speedboats to complicate everything. Today there are scientific abominations all around us — and yes — they are coming to get you. (And we were hoping to keep this from you a bit longer, but they are also coming for your loved ones and family pet too.)

Seeing as how things move so quickly in this day in age, we thought it worthwhile compile a short list of some of things you need to worry about over the weekend.

Quoth Illidan: You are not prepared.

Chimeras

Science will ruin everything. Everything.

Scientists at the University of Nevada say they've figured out how make a human-sheep chimera. That's a sheep with 85 per cent animal cells and 15 per cent human cells.

It's done by an elegant process of sucking stem cells out from a person's bone marrow and injecting them into the unripe belly of a sheep fetus. The apparent point is to one day let animals rather courteously grow our organs for human transplant.

Here's the deal — the only place where human bone marrow and sheep fetuses should be mixed together is the grinder in a hotdog factory. And sheepmen? Really? We'll bet a good portion of our readers have turned off the filtering on Google Image Search and accidentally seen drawings of what some people fantasize doing to human/animal hybrid creatures. (And Mrs. Buttersworth too, apparently. I still have nightmares.)

If all that's not enough to scare you, this author has a handy little reference manual called a "D&D sourcebook" and it flat-out says Chimera are by nature chaotic evil. And 2d6+4 bite attacks aren't something our children should be exposed to. Ever.

Call me old fashion.

But back to the organ thing. A lot of us sleep better knowing, worst comes to worst, there's a guy that knows a guy who will pay a lot of money for a human kidney — no questions asked. Suddenly Joe Renal Disease can upgrade to an A-grade sheep organ for a song. Where does that leave us growing organs au naturel? These creatures are coming for our rent money too.

Danger level: 3/5

Reducing the cost and complexity of web vulnerability management

More from The Register

next story
PORTAL TO ELSEWHERE scried in small galaxy far, far away
Supermassive black hole dominates titchy star formation
Boffins say they've got Lithium batteries the wrong way around
Surprises at the nano-scale mean our ideas about how they charge could be all wrong
Edge Research Lab to tackle chilly LOHAN's final test flight
Our US allies to probe potential Vulture 2 servo freeze
Europe prepares to INVADE comet: Rosetta landing site chosen
No word yet on whether backup site is labelled 'K'
Cracked it - Vulture 2 power podule fires servos for 4 HOURS
Pixhawk avionics juice issue sorted, onwards to Spaceport America
Archaeologists and robots on hunt for more Antikythera pieces
How much of the world's oldest computer can they find?
Bacon-related medical breakthrough wins Ig Nobel prize
Is there ANYTHING cured pork can't do?
prev story

Whitepapers

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops
Balancing user privacy and privileged access, in accordance with compliance frameworks and legislation. Evaluating any potential remote control choice.
WIN a very cool portable ZX Spectrum
Win a one-off portable Spectrum built by legendary hardware hacker Ben Heck
Storage capacity and performance optimization at Mizuno USA
Mizuno USA turn to Tegile storage technology to solve both their SAN and backup issues.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
The next step in data security
With recent increased privacy concerns and computers becoming more powerful, the chance of hackers being able to crack smaller-sized RSA keys increases.