We're delighted to announce today that the world's favourite tat bazaar is offering members of its eBay Extra programme free cash to spend on purchases in the form of a "coupon", although the offer is evidently open to those in possession of a fully functioning time machine or lucky enough to live near a time-shifting wormhole:

Sadly, of course, once you get back to 1970 to redeem your coupon, you'll find that eBay has not yet come into existence, which in itself suggests the coupon cannot exist or, more alarmingly, that eBay will in the future master time travel and nip back and actually create itself on 1 January 1970, meaning that at some unspecified time humanity will suddenly become aware that eBay has been around for more than 30 years and that the racing bike you got for your eleventh birthday was not actually bought in the local High Street, but rather from a bloke in Huddersfield using an eBay Extra coupon. ®

Bootnote

Thanks to Shaun Burnett for the tip.

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