School-dodging Mexican lad glues self to bed
'I didn't want to go'
A ten-year-old Monterrey lad who didn't much fancy the return to school following the Xmas hols simply attached himself to his bed with "industrial strength shoe glue", local paper Reforma reports.
Diego Palacios explained: "I thought if I was glued to the bed, they couldn't make me go to school. I didn't want to go, the holidays were so much fun."
With his hand securely attached to the bed's metal headboard, Diego got down to the serious business of watching TV, while mum Sandra called in the cavalary. Diego apparently continued to watch cartoons while paramedics and police attempted to get him unstuck.
After around two hours, they used a solvent spray to free the scamp, and he was duly dispatched off to school a few hours late.
Sandra Palacios said: "I don't know why this happened. He is a very good boy, but mischievous like all kids." ®
The old "glue yourself to something" trick is not, of course, new. One Reg hack once legendarily attempted to avoid a post- (very robust) lunch return to the office by glueing his non-pint hand to the pub radiator.
Sadly, the establishment was in range of the Vulture Central Wi-Fi network, and once a laptop had been dispatched, the poor bloke was faced with the prospect of the whole afternoon typing one-handed while unable to get to the bar for essential refreshment. There's a moral in there somewhere.
Supeman that loco!
HE SUPERMAN'D HIMSELF!! HAHAHAHAHA
"supermanning that ho" involves using adhesive to attach a girl to the sheets on a bed, making it look like she has a cape
"2.5- Feed him caffeinated sodas and chocolate Ex-Lax and let him stew in his own juices for awhile."
but who's going to clean up the mess?
Clearly this is the Calpurnia strategy...
[Flavius Maximus] Mrs Caesar? Can you tell us anything about your husband's death?
[Calpurnia] I told him! I told him 'Julie don't go!!'
Yes, the Driza-Bone, please, and the battered Akubra