Feeds

Taser unleashes leopardskin C2 and MP3 holster

Ladies to pack 'fashion with a bite'

Next gen security for virtualised datacentres

Taser International yesterday used CES in Las Vegas to unleash the last word in must-have, non-lethal fashion accessories - a leopardskin Taser C2 which can be rather splendidly carried in a new one-gig "Music Player Holster" (MPH).

The leopardskin Taser C2The latest addition to the C2 range complements the existing black, blue, pink and silver flavours designed to appeal to the threatened female demographic. Taser big cheese Rick Smith explained: "These new products are a result of listening to our customers. Personal protection can be both fashionable and functionable. The Taser C2 leopard print design provides a personal protection option for women who want fashion with a bite."

The MPH, meanwhile, is evidently the company's reponse to female customers' concerns that their kids might mistake the C2 for a toy and indulge in a bit of "let's play UCLA students and cops".

This legitimate worry led one worried mum to admit recently that while she really was looking for the peace of mind that only a Taser can bring, once she took delivery of her high-voltage enforcer, she'd "keep it locked in a box under the bed with the keys out of the kids' reach".

This, of course, makes the thing pretty well useless in the event of crack-crazed Latino assassination squads storming the house with assault rifles, so what better way to protect your family than stowing your Taser in its MPH and getting on with the dusting while grooving to Electric Ladyland? ®

Bootnote

For those among you who really must have accessories which match every outfit, the C2 is also now available in "red-hot red and fashion pink", which should allow you to avoid unfortunate colour clashes at sex-themed Californian fancy dress parties where you'll need solid protection to repel the advances of San Diego State University researchers asking you to blow on their tubes.

The essential guide to IT transformation

More from The Register

next story
MEN WANTED to satisfy town full of yearning BRAZILIAN HOTNESS
'Prettier, better organised, more harmonious than if men were in charge'
Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD
'Officers were unable to determine Chicken's intent'
Yes, but what are your plans if a DRAGON attacks?
Local UK gov outs most ridiculous FoI requests...
Drunkards warned: If you can't walk in a straight line, don't shop online, you fool!
Put it away boys. Cover them up ladies. Your credit cards, we mean
Why your mum was WRONG about whiffy tattooed people
They're a future source of RENEWABLE ENERGY
Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'
US court hears of cached browser image - not actual request
Chomp that sausage: Brits just LOVE scoffing a Full Monty
Sales of traditional brekkie foods soar as hungry folk get their mitts greasy
prev story

Whitepapers

5 things you didn’t know about cloud backup
IT departments are embracing cloud backup, but there’s a lot you need to know before choosing a service provider. Learn all the critical things you need to know.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Backing up Big Data
Solving backup challenges and “protect everything from everywhere,” as we move into the era of big data management and the adoption of BYOD.
Consolidation: The Foundation for IT Business Transformation
In this whitepaper learn how effective consolidation of IT and business resources can enable multiple, meaningful business benefits.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?