Feeds

Taser unleashes leopardskin C2 and MP3 holster

Ladies to pack 'fashion with a bite'

Secure remote control for conventional and virtual desktops

Taser International yesterday used CES in Las Vegas to unleash the last word in must-have, non-lethal fashion accessories - a leopardskin Taser C2 which can be rather splendidly carried in a new one-gig "Music Player Holster" (MPH).

The leopardskin Taser C2The latest addition to the C2 range complements the existing black, blue, pink and silver flavours designed to appeal to the threatened female demographic. Taser big cheese Rick Smith explained: "These new products are a result of listening to our customers. Personal protection can be both fashionable and functionable. The Taser C2 leopard print design provides a personal protection option for women who want fashion with a bite."

The MPH, meanwhile, is evidently the company's reponse to female customers' concerns that their kids might mistake the C2 for a toy and indulge in a bit of "let's play UCLA students and cops".

This legitimate worry led one worried mum to admit recently that while she really was looking for the peace of mind that only a Taser can bring, once she took delivery of her high-voltage enforcer, she'd "keep it locked in a box under the bed with the keys out of the kids' reach".

This, of course, makes the thing pretty well useless in the event of crack-crazed Latino assassination squads storming the house with assault rifles, so what better way to protect your family than stowing your Taser in its MPH and getting on with the dusting while grooving to Electric Ladyland? ®

Bootnote

For those among you who really must have accessories which match every outfit, the C2 is also now available in "red-hot red and fashion pink", which should allow you to avoid unfortunate colour clashes at sex-themed Californian fancy dress parties where you'll need solid protection to repel the advances of San Diego State University researchers asking you to blow on their tubes.

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
'It is comforting to know where your data centres are.' UK.GOV does NOT
Plus: Anons are 'wannabes', KKK says, before being pwned
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Criticism of Uber's journo-Data Analytics plan is an Attack on DIGITAL FREEDOM
First they came for Emil – and I'm damn well SPEAKING OUT
Bible THUMP: Good Book beats Darwin to most influential tome title
Folio Society crowns fittest of surviving volumes
U wot? Silicon Roundabout set to become Silicon U-BEND
Crap-spouting London upstarts to get permanent road closure
prev story

Whitepapers

Choosing cloud Backup services
Demystify how you can address your data protection needs in your small- to medium-sized business and select the best online backup service to meet your needs.
Getting started with customer-focused identity management
Learn why identity is a fundamental requirement to digital growth, and how without it there is no way to identify and engage customers in a meaningful way.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Security and trust: The backbone of doing business over the internet
Explores the current state of website security and the contributions Symantec is making to help organizations protect critical data and build trust with customers.
Saudi Petroleum chooses Tegile storage solution
A storage solution that addresses company growth and performance for business-critical applications of caseware archive and search along with other key operational systems.