Feeds

Presenting the inaugural Vulture Central Hall of Lame™

2007: Year of the dingbat

  • alert
  • submit to reddit

Choosing a cloud hosting partner with confidence

Quotations It was the Greek dramatist Sophocles who once wrote: "A short saying often contains much wisdom."

And Marlene Dietrich said: "I love quotations because it is a joy to find thoughts one might have, beautifully expressed with much authority by someone recognised wiser than oneself."

Hmmm.

What guff. Here at Vulture Central we subscribe to the Somerset Maugham school of thought, which says that the ability to quote is merely a "serviceable substitute for wit". With that in mind, we present for your enjoyment a selection of 2007's greatest public statements.

Yes, it's that time of year when the thundering torrent of news becomes a pathetic trickle, and most would be too drunk to care if Google and Microsoft merged anyway.

We've done illustrations and everything. You might call it filler - we couldn't possibly comment.

Our list is neither comprehensive nor scientific. If you've got your own favourite clangers from this year, feel free as ever to deface our comments section.

To the chunter bunker!

"Those will be good acquisitions, and they're important to us. And they're of strategic importance."

Steve "On The" Ballmer, on the 20 unidentified web companies Microsoft is planning to buy every year for the next five years.

"There’s a faddishness, a faddish nature about anything that basically appeals to younger people."

Steve Ballmer on Facebook, shortly before paying $240m for 1.6 per cent of it.

"I would like to say that accessibility for Linux users is EXACTLY the same issue as accessibility for those with disabilities."

"Lee" (not pictured), giving a remarkably candid assessment of his computer use commenting on BBC tech chief Ashley Highfield's blog. Highfield argued that the Linux iPlayer should be a low priority because of the OS's small number of desktop users.

Nathan Barley

"As a self-actualising media node, I welcome this redistribution of government funds from provincial luddites to new media 'creative' Sohoites... Ed Richards's initiative 'gets' new media on so many levels. Let's flashmob this bitch up to escape velocity."

Reg reader W Jackson's sarcastic submission to the consultation process for Ofcom's Public Service Publisher quango. Ofcom called it a "new media answer to a new media question". MPs preferred the description: "A cure for which there is no known disease."

"Frankly, the world wasn't 100 per cent ready for Windows Vista."

Microsoft VP Mike Sievert, explaining why everyone's still running and buying XP.

"Dude, I invented the friggin iPhone. Have you heard of it?"

Satirical blogger Fake Steve Jobs, who was eventually unmasked as Forbes journalist Dan Lyons. iPhone? Nope, never heard of it, guv.

Security for virtualized datacentres

More from The Register

next story
Every billionaire needs a PANZER TANK, right? STOP THERE, Paul Allen
Angry Microsoftie hauls auctioneers to court over stalled Pzkw. IV 'deal'
Apple's Mr Havisham: Tim Cook says dead Steve Jobs' office has remained untouched
'I literally think about him every day' says biz baron's old friend
Flaming drone batteries ground commercial flight before takeoff
Passenger had Something To Declare, instead fiddled while plane burned
Cops apologise for leaving EXPLOSIVES in suitcase at airport
'Canine training exercise' SNAFU sees woman take home booming baggage
WRISTJOB LOVE BONANZA: justWatch sex app promises blind date hookups
Mankind shuffles into the future, five fingers at a time
prev story

Whitepapers

Providing a secure and efficient Helpdesk
A single remote control platform for user support is be key to providing an efficient helpdesk. Retain full control over the way in which screen and keystroke data is transmitted.
Saudi Petroleum chooses Tegile storage solution
A storage solution that addresses company growth and performance for business-critical applications of caseware archive and search along with other key operational systems.
Security and trust: The backbone of doing business over the internet
Explores the current state of website security and the contributions Symantec is making to help organizations protect critical data and build trust with customers.
Reg Reader Research: SaaS based Email and Office Productivity Tools
Read this Reg reader report which provides advice and guidance for SMBs towards the use of SaaS based email and Office productivity tools.
Security for virtualized datacentres
Legacy security solutions are inefficient due to the architectural differences between physical and virtual environments.