Feeds

US tech support outfit seeks pocket sniffer

Highly-specialised freelance gig

The Power of One Brief: Top reasons to choose HP BladeSystem

Attention all IT freelancers with a couple of spare hours and a fully-functioning olfactory system: US tech support outfit Computer Assistant recently issued a request for a highly specialised onsite service:

SERVICE REQUEST # 1012646
REQUESTED BY: Pablo at Computer Assistant
REPLY TO: XXXX@computerassistant.com
JOB LOCATION: Austin, TX 78741

Client needs a tech onsite to sniff some pockets. Service is needed today before 3 pm. To be considered for this job: Please reply with your HOURLY BID (rate) and AVAILABILITY. We pay for time on-site (with a one hour minimum) and pro-rated hourly after that. Travel pay does not apply unless specifically arranged. We consider your rate, previous performance, skills, availability, and distance from client location before making our selection.

After our selection, you will be notified again by email if you have been awarded the job.

When service is complete, we MAIL A CHECK to your name and address you have posted online.

Lovely. Since Computer Assistant offers a helping hand to companies in all 50 US states, it should note that the sniffing of pockets is illegal in Maryland and Ohio, and is punishable by death in Mississippi. ®

Eight steps to building an HP BladeSystem

More from The Register

next story
NSA man: 'Tell me about your Turkish connections'
Spooks ask Dabbsy to suggest a nice hotel with pool
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
Russia sends SEX-CRAZED GECKOS to SPAAAAACE!
In space... no one can hear you're green...
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Accused! Yahoo! exec! SUES! her! accuser!, says! sex! harassment! never! happened!
Allegations were for 'financial gain', countersuit claims
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Boost IT visibility and business value
How building a great service catalog relieves pressure points and demonstrates the value of IT service management.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.