Which in time honoured tradition was on a post-it next to the lock.

not to be sniffed at.

It surely cannot take the HMRC too long to ask the 10 people who allegedly have access what has happened to the concaine, yet they dont appear to be able to ask , why ??

I like that almost as much as 'booger sugar'.

Only lose their car keys or a couple of quid on the horses but HMRC don't seem to lose anything trivial, are they trying to compensate for some kind of departmental inferiority complex?

We should be grateful they weren't looking after WW II, they probably would have lost that too.

...it's forecast to snow in the midlands....

Rumours just in is that it was mixed with a small amount of tipex and used to coat snowflakes onto the office windows as part of the decroate an office for xmas competition. Although events were marred this year by a group of house-flies that were seen beating up a cat outside the office in the carpark and a office cleaner bouncing around in the swing doors for over half an hour.

That HMRC are headhunting the now redundant Steve Mclaren for a management role after his exemplary record in loosing key matches.

HMRC may have organised themselves a white Christmas

I'm still waiting for an invite to the HMRC Xmas party....

I wonder whenever they're going to bring in random drugs testing for Government employees so that we can know those dependent on and slaves to Charlie and his mates. They certainly can act as if they are out of their heads and aint that the truth.

Oh yes, that'd be the nose AJAX. I'll get my coat...

Where is your one? Why it was sent to me, along with your NI number and bank details....;-)

By *my* reckoning you've used a street price of 600 quid a gram.

Less than ten people knew the password to a cageful of dangerous drugs? What an outrage! I am apoplectic! Less than ten people? It's FEWER! FEWER than ten people! Can we get nothing right?

True. If only HMRC hadn't mislaid their record of which ten had the password.

What's the meaning of this huge jiffy bag of white powder I received in the mail this morning?

Just look for whichever members of staff are partying the hardest over xmas... and just check to see if they've bought a new Ferrari, too...

Rather like the month of PHP exploits, one per day, it seems like December 2007 is striving to be "How many embarrassing losses can we admit in one month?" for the government. Priceless.

Combine with Fasthosts resetting customers passwords about three times and it's been a comical month for El Reg ;)

Apparently the passwords were sent out to key officials on CD-Rs in the post.

"What I don't know at the minute is whether this cocaine has been sent for destruction, or to a court or to a forensic science laboratory and the paperwork has not been done properly or it has been stolen. I am very worried if it is the latter."

He's "very worried" if the cocaine had been stolen. So he's not worried if it was sent out but the paperwork had not been done properly? THAT would worry me almost as much.

it's not around any more but I am sure it was put to it's normally accepted use, also maybe they sold the data to get more coke. It's all starting to make sense to me now all those pompous trunks in the nervous powder making pathetic excuses a child wouldn't believe and stealing everything that isn't nailed down.

Of somebody chopping out lots of lines on the back of a couple of CD jewel cases. ;)

Well Hartnett doesn't appear paranoid enough for it to have been him who's pinched it.

He does seem laid back enough about the affair to sound like he's smoking something else though!

The culprit is the one who returns to work after Christmas with only one nostril.

I reckon that someone's taken it out to trade for a couple of used CDs.......

El Reg isn't nesecarrily wrong with their calculations, you did ask them how much they were cutting it and what with. We know how they can be harsh critics, prehaps their harsh drug dealers as well and cut it mean at 30/70.

(jumping up and down on the spot dying to get my coat, thengoingoutforapartysomewhere, needtodosomething, needtotalkcodshit)

So why did they have it there in the first place? - after all, HMRC are not the police, they are not MI5, nor MI6, and they're not staffed by celebs, surely they were breaking the law by storing it!.....

One does not LOSE 1.5 kg of cocaine. Keys get lost (not cars), socks get lost (not feet), people get lost (especially if they go wondering into some parts of Glasgow on a Saturday night) - I bloody wish that Gordon Brown would get lost.

But NOBODY loses 1.5 kg cocaine. It simpy CANNOT happen.

It can be stolen (presumably by one or more of the "magic 10"), it can be sold, it can be cut and sold (as so eloquently posted above). But it does not, no matter how much of it has been sneeked off for personal use, open it's own lock from the inside and then march back to Bolivia.

TBH all 10 should be immediately suspended (without pay) until the culprit is identified or the security lapse uncovered. Come to think of it, that same approach would save our dear country £billions (and a good few RW-CD's)

I tell you what, ask all ten whether they removed the stash. If they all deny it, it's theft. If one says 'oh I had to submit it to court x as evidence in case y, sorry I didn't sign it out', it isn't theft.

Or is this too taxing? (No pun intended)

Why did they have it there? Sounds like a nice secure place to store your stash. :-) No wonder they are upset...

the government lost for me 12 Million bank details, 11 Million personal details, 10 people with a password, 9 Thousand lines of cocaine, 8 Junior Workers, 7 Million Illegal Immigrants, 60 billion odd quid to northern rock , 5 hundred thousand Scots votes, 4 dodgy donations , 3 Million driving license records, 2 CD's. and an HMRC chairman.

Ding Dong, Merrily and High !!!

the government's ears are ringing

Pissed up agents drawing nigh

for those CD's they're searching

co-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-caine, some-mo-oh-ore cocaine, and just some more cocaine - a line

Let's waste it on the bankers.

Good Old Gordo last looked out

from his common's armchair

heard his party shouting out,

"Gordon, best beware

Fo-o-o-o-o-o-o o-o-o-o-o-o o-o-o-o-o-or we are

A bunch of spineless junkies"

Silence, Knight; Keep your mouth tight

This is our stash; I'm cutting it right

In the morning it's worth two times more

Then you can sell it on the trading floor

Bleet and I'll see you in Prison

Bleet and your going to jail.

Gordon Brown at last looked out; from his comfy armchair

Heard his faithful shouting out, "Gordon, you'd best beware"

Brightly shone their beeks that night; 'cause the frost was pure

No-body had realised; this country's in the sewer.

I feel these Christmas Ditties need a reg article to themselves. I was just trying to beat some of the suggestions on the BBC Cricket page as I read about England getting thrashed by Sri Lanka. Surely El Reg can do better than a bunch of cricket fans.

Wasn't there a monkey that chased a weasle?

I R Baboon & I M Weasle?

(As sung by the HMRC choir)

We wish you a merry Christmas,

We wish you a merry Christmas,

We've just "lost" a load of white dust,

But you've nothing to fear!

Your I.D. is safe,

On our database,

We'll just have to keep our fingers crossed,

What a horrible year!

A new job for Paul Grey,

Pay your taxes we say,

We'll wish you a merry Christmas,

If you'll buy us a beer!

Concaine? That's Chilli Concaine, is it?

Why was it at HMRC? Just a guess, but possibly it's to do with the C of HMRC... (HMRC now includes Customs and Excise.)

Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

A. Those 10 password holders? They haven't asked because HMRC has lost the list of their names, and no longer knows who they are.

B. Or: It wasn't a password, it was a 3-digit number to activate a keypad controlled lock. And someone simply tried one combination after another. Remember, Richard Feynman was able to unlock "secure" safes at Los Alamos for amusement.

Deck the halls with lines of cocaine

Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

Where it came from is uncertain

Fa la la la la la, la la la la.

Perhaps we should invent a shorthand unit for dissapation (instead of milliwats per nano wales) we should have the HMRC as they are so good at loosing things, 1 HMRC would be the details of 1 million people) so this I guess this little mishap with the nasal funky flour would be about a milliHMRC.

Actually, HMRC have MORE powers than the police. They do not, for instance, need a warrant to enter your home or property. Remember the tobacco pirates who got their cars/vans confiscated upon returning to the uk ? HMRC. They didn't have to call the police, or get a court order, they just take it off you.

Money rules this country, this is nothing new.