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Brit workers: The Xmas skive starts today

Work? Stuff that

Internet Security Threat Report 2014

A poll of 2,500 Brit workers has confirmed what most of us already knew: the Xmas holiday starts tonight at 5pm as a third of the UK's workforce will "mentally switch off" in advance of next week's pre-Yule skive.

That's according to Teletext holidays, which estimates that nine million people will from Monday fill their working hours with gossip, extended and undoubtedly robust lunches, Christmas shopping and general faffing about until Friday.

Nearly a quarter of workers "plan to go out on up to ten work nights during December, a fifth have up to five long lunches scheduled and nearly half said coming into work hungover during the festive build up was perfectly acceptable", as the Telegraph puts it.

Those who aren't sloshed or buying prezzies may well still be in bed or throwing a sickie. Almost a third of those polled admitted they plan to come into work late at least once next week and a fifth 'fessed up to planning a full day off with pub flu.

We tried to conduct a Reg straw poll to confirm the above findings, but the sales department has been lodged in the nearest wine bar since 11am, the Strategy Boutique emailed in to say it was "redefining the pro-somnia paradigm" (i.e. still in bed), and members of the editorial team nipped out an hour ago "for a news meeting" and are believed to be exchanging Xmas gifts (beer, in pint glasses) in Vulture Central local The Scribe and Strumpet. ®

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