Wigan man traps todger in metal ring
Cue fire brigade bearing handgrinder
A Wigan man narrowly avoided having his penis amputated after getting the end of it wedged in a "metal ring", Wigan Today reports.
The unnamed chap, in his 40s, was whisked to Wigan Infirmary's A&E department just after midnight on Wednesday carrying the extra hardware which "appeared to be cut off from the end of a pipe". Docs tried in vain to remove the ring, but "the hospital's ring cutter equipment could not saw through the hard metal".
Sawbones feared the man might lose his todger since "the ring appeared to be cutting off the blood supply, causing a large amount of swelling". Two firemen from Wigan Fire Station were quickly called in bearing a mini handgrinder, "normally used to cut through padlocks", and they set to work.
The man was anaesthetised, the firefighters positioned "a thin sheet of metal around the penis underneath the ring to protect the skin" and after about 20 minutes he was released.
Wigan Today offers no explanation as to how the patient came to get his spam javelin stuck in a section of metal pipe, but does say that a Wigan Infirmary spokesman felt "unable to comment". ®
I once did a charity 'stunt' (or, was that a "cupid stunt?") by standing at a bus stop in Tampere, Finland with my vacuum celaner hose stuck down my pants, holding the cleaner and asking passers-by "Which is the bus to the hospital?"
Got 50 Finmarks/hour (year 2000) from the pub locals for the local Lions. Plus a lot of laughs. And a helluva lotta kudos!
Found the I.T. angle...
It's Friday. Cock-ups always happen on Friday.
... and the hat please.
The IT/PH angle..
an obtuse angle..
or is it an acute [pain] angle?
*COAT* ... *DOOR*