Feeds

Wigan man traps todger in metal ring

Cue fire brigade bearing handgrinder

Remote control for virtualized desktops

A Wigan man narrowly avoided having his penis amputated after getting the end of it wedged in a "metal ring", Wigan Today reports.

The unnamed chap, in his 40s, was whisked to Wigan Infirmary's A&E department just after midnight on Wednesday carrying the extra hardware which "appeared to be cut off from the end of a pipe". Docs tried in vain to remove the ring, but "the hospital's ring cutter equipment could not saw through the hard metal".

Sawbones feared the man might lose his todger since "the ring appeared to be cutting off the blood supply, causing a large amount of swelling". Two firemen from Wigan Fire Station were quickly called in bearing a mini handgrinder, "normally used to cut through padlocks", and they set to work.

The man was anaesthetised, the firefighters positioned "a thin sheet of metal around the penis underneath the ring to protect the skin" and after about 20 minutes he was released.

Wigan Today offers no explanation as to how the patient came to get his spam javelin stuck in a section of metal pipe, but does say that a Wigan Infirmary spokesman felt "unable to comment". ®

Top 5 reasons to deploy VMware with Tegile

More from The Register

next story
Holy vintage vehicles! Earliest known official Batmobile goes on sale
Riddle me this: are you prepared to pay US$180k?
Bible THUMP: Good Book beats Darwin to most influential tome title
Folio Society crowns fittest of surviving volumes
'Open source just means big companies can steal your code.' O RLY?
Plus: Flame of the Week returns, for one night only!
U wot? Silicon Roundabout set to become Silicon U-BEND
Crap-spouting London upstarts to get permanent road closure
Hey, you, PHONE-FACE! Kickstarter in-car mobe mount will EMBED your phone into your MUG
Stick it on the steering wheel and wait for the airbag to fire
NEWSFLASH: It's time to ditch dullard Facebook chums
Everything hot in tech, courtesy of avian anchor Regina Eggbert
Useless 'computer engineer' Barbie sacked in three-way fsck row
Tale of two lads and wannabe game dev makes for great management material
Microsoft to bring back beloved 1990s super-hit BATTLETOADS!?*
* Or maybe not. It is just a trademark filing, after all
prev story

Whitepapers

Why and how to choose the right cloud vendor
The benefits of cloud-based storage in your processes. Eliminate onsite, disk-based backup and archiving in favor of cloud-based data protection.
A strategic approach to identity relationship management
ForgeRock commissioned Forrester to evaluate companies’ IAM practices and requirements when it comes to customer-facing scenarios versus employee-facing ones.
High Performance for All
While HPC is not new, it has traditionally been seen as a specialist area – is it now geared up to meet more mainstream requirements?
Protecting against web application threats using SSL
SSL encryption can protect server‐to‐server communications, client devices, cloud resources, and other endpoints in order to help prevent the risk of data loss and losing customer trust.
Intelligent flash storage arrays
Tegile Intelligent Storage Arrays with IntelliFlash helps IT boost storage utilization and effciency while delivering unmatched storage savings and performance.