Feeds

Kim Jong Il: dictator, gnome, and now 'internet expert'

Who told him about the tubes?

The Power of One Brief: Top reasons to choose HP BladeSystem

This week's historic reconciliation summit between North and South Korea has delivered an unexpected nugget of pure news gold: as well as being a "mad as cheese" bon viveur and the world's greatest golfer, Kim Jong Il considers himself an expert in packet-switched networking.

Kim Jong Il fro team America, World Police

That's actually a tricked-out Mac Pro. Liquid cooled and everything.

News agency Yonhap reports the reclusive despot made the claim in reponse to a request from South Korean President Roh Moo-hyun that South Korean industry trading in the North be allowed online.

Kim responded: "I'm an internet expert too. It's all right to wire the industrial zone only, but there are many problems if other regions of the North are wired."

It almost sounds like BT's reasoning for not laying fibre to the home.

But we digress. "If that problem is addressed, there is no reason not to open [the internet]," Kim continued, explaining that the internet isn't for ordinary North Koreans, only experts like him.

The regime tightly controls all communications in North Korea. Internet access is completely locked down for military and important government applications. Kim, a notorious ladies' man, reportedly asked for then-US Secretary of State Madeleine Albright's email address when she visited in 2000.

Presently, there are two Kim Jong Ils listed on Facebook. He's probably trawling for babes as we write - his loneliness was of course well documeted in Team America: World Police. ®

Eight steps to building an HP BladeSystem

More from The Register

next story
NSA man: 'Tell me about your Turkish connections'
Spooks ask Dabbsy to suggest a nice hotel with pool
Carlos: Slim your working week to just three days of toil
'Midas World' vision suggests you retire later, watch more tellie and buy more stuff
Motorist 'thought car had caught fire' as Adele track came on stereo
'FIRE' caption on dashboard prompts dunderheaded hard shoulder halt
Yahoo! Japan! launches! service! for! the! dead!
If you're reading this email, I am no longer alive
Plucky Rockall podule man back on (proper) dry land
Bold, barmy Brit adventurer Nick Hancock escapes North Atlantic islet
Russia sends SEX-CRAZED GECKOS to SPAAAAACE!
In space... no one can hear you're green...
Brit Rockall adventurer poised to quit islet
Occupation records broken, champagne corks popped
Accused! Yahoo! exec! SUES! her! accuser!, says! sex! harassment! never! happened!
Allegations were for 'financial gain', countersuit claims
prev story

Whitepapers

Top three mobile application threats
Prevent sensitive data leakage over insecure channels or stolen mobile devices.
Implementing global e-invoicing with guaranteed legal certainty
Explaining the role local tax compliance plays in successful supply chain management and e-business and how leading global brands are addressing this.
Boost IT visibility and business value
How building a great service catalog relieves pressure points and demonstrates the value of IT service management.
Designing a Defense for Mobile Applications
Learn about the various considerations for defending mobile applications - from the application architecture itself to the myriad testing technologies.
Build a business case: developing custom apps
Learn how to maximize the value of custom applications by accelerating and simplifying their development.